tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-258183322024-03-07T02:18:30.333-06:00A Girl Jesus Set Free.Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.comBlogger680125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-80073686808435197232014-10-19T09:48:00.001-05:002014-10-19T12:34:16.853-05:00Tiny Homes<style>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
For several years now Randy has
wanted to build a “Tiny Home.” It’s like a travel trailer but it looks like a
real house…it even has a porch. He has spent HOURS thinking, researching,
planning, dreaming and talking about building these Tiny Homes to sell. He’s
even drawn up his own blueprints (that I love.) </div>
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Here's what the Tiny Homes look like on the outside and inside. </div>
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The problem is that it cost a lot
to build. He has had someone interested in investing in the idea, but the catch
was that Randy had to find a bank that would loan a buyer the money to buy the
finished product. Randy went to several banks and came up empty. The banks
don’t want to make such a large unsecured loan on something without a Blue Book
value. This past year it seemed a few times that Randy was going to be able to
figure out a way to get it valued but so far nothing has come up solid. </div>
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Well, a few months ago Randy came
up with a different idea. He used to “flip houses” for a living. For several
years that’s what he did. He bought houses, fixed them up himself (or with
helpers) and then sold them for a profit. That’s now what he wants to do with
Travel Trailers (or RV’s.) His idea was to buy an old Travel Trailer that needs
a lot of work for a cheap price, fix it up super nice then sell it for a
profit. Then, with the profit roll it into buying the next trailer…doing the
same thing, and eventually having enough money to build his 1<sup>st</sup> TINY
HOME. He knows if he can get that 1<sup>st</sup> one built and sold then he
would be on his way to making them for a living. </div>
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Well, I’m happy to say that this
week we bought our first Travel Trailer to fix up and sell!!! We bought it from
a man about an hour away. We piled up the kids after school, bribed them to be
nice to one another the whole way there and back and drove down curvy back
roads. We finally made it to a kind man that had tons of land, some cattle and
llamas and for some reason sold us an awesome travel trailer for a much lower
price than he advertised it for. We offered him one price and he countered with
an even lower price. </div>
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We were in the minivan so we had to
pay and leave it there, but yesterday Randy, Melody, his brother and sister in
law went back and picked it up. This morning I woke up to an empty bed. Randy
is outside taking measurements and making plans. He’s so excited. He’s been
carrying around a RV parts catalog like it’s a Bible. </div>
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I’m excited for him. He’s been
dreaming and planning for so many years. Now he is getting to physically work
on something. He’s on his way. It will probably take awhile to complete because
he will have to work on it after work, weekends and as we have the money to
restore, but he’s still on his way. Exciting!!!<br />
Here are some BEFORE pictures of the trailer.<br />
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Don't Worry...Randy has seen a lot worse! : ) <br /> </div>
Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-57815257802844037512014-10-08T20:15:00.001-05:002014-10-08T20:15:38.577-05:00A New Blog Beginning...
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So yeah, I haven’t blogged <s>recently </s>in a really long
time. I mean a loooonnnnngggg time. I’ve been healing I guess. Last weekend
would have been Miles’ 10<sup>th</sup> birthday. That makes it his 4<sup>th</sup>
birthday in heaven. I woke up that morning with a heavy heart. I was in bed
remembering him. Remembering his hair. Remembering taking care of his body.
Remembering running around town taking him to therapies. Remembering what it
was like to love him and be loved by him. Then I remembered my blog. I wrote so
many details on there over a period of 6 years. Suddenly I had a deep desire to
preserve them. That’s the way I spent his birthday…preserving those details
about him and the rest of our family. I transferred my blog to a PDF. Anyway,
reading over so many of those posts made me realize how much I missed blogging.
After Miles died I just didn’t seem to get writing ideas anymore. It’s not like
I wanted to write and couldn’t think of anything. It’s just that it was gone. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was talking
to Randy about what in the world I would write about now. I have no idea. My
houseful of teenagers probably won’t appreciate me sharing all their business
on here. When they were young it didn’t seem to matter as much.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t talk too much about work because there are rules
about that. I will say that teaching Kindergarten has been a huge part of my
healing. I love being around young children all day. I feel like myself there.
This is my third year teaching and it fits me perfectly. For that, I am
thankful. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
So, I’m not sure what I will write
about. I’m not sure how often it will be. I just want to be open to allow that
gifting The Lord gave me to rise up in me again. </div>
<!--EndFragment-->Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-64858063986006039912012-05-01T17:48:00.000-05:002012-05-01T17:48:38.650-05:00SpencerFor Spencer's math class he was assigned to write 3 story problems. I think the assignment came at the end of last week and he had been thinking about it a lot, asking me some questions about it and adding details to ideas. He had decided early on that he wanted to make up a character named Jerry the Cat. He also decided early on that he wanted to do a play on nursery rhymes. Well, like I said he continued to flush out his ideas and finally finished writing the problems last night. I'm a proud Mama! I just had to share them with you!<br />
<br />
Obviously I haven't been able to read the other kid's story problems. Still, I can't imagine them being as amazing as Spencer's! He could have taken the assignment and quickly written down some lame problems, but he put so much thought into it. Anyway, here's a copy of what he wrote:<br />
<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>Jerry the Cat was going to work one
day when he came across Jack and Jill’s house. He was very puzzled when he saw
Jill going up the hill. She explained that she was taking over Jack’s job of
fetching the water because Jack has had a severe headache ever since he fell
down the hill. Jill was confused because Jack told her to get 2 pints of water,
but the pale went up to 5 cups. It didn’t say anything about pints. Jerry the
Cat told her that a pint is two times as big as a cup. He told her that if she
multiplied the number of pints you need by 2 then you get the number in cups.
By doing that they figured out she needed 4 cups of water. She quickly put 4
cups of water in the pale and went back down the hill. </b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>Jerry the Cat also passed Wolf and
Pigs Deconstruction Company. Mr. Wolf was making a billboard. It read, “HAY and
STICK HOUSES only $100.” The problem was he didn’t know what to charge for blowing
down brick houses. He figured it was 4 times harder to blow down a brick house
than it was for one hay or one stick house. To help Mr. Wolf, Jerry the Cat
told him just to be safe to use proportion to get the price of the brick house
based on the price of blowing down stick and hay houses. Mr. Wolf brought out a
fan for blowing the houses down. He built the hay house then placed the fan on
the first setting. The hay house blew away quickly. The same thing happened for
the stick house. To blow down the brick house the fan had to be placed on the setting
of 5 to blow it down. Mr. Wolf decided it should cost 5 times more to destroy
brick houses than both the hay and stick houses. So he multiplied 5 times $100
to get $500, which was the price of blowing down the brick houses. </b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>After that Jerry the Cat saw his
friend March Hare who was running late for his appointment with the Queen of
Hearts (as usual.) He did not know why he was always late until he realized
that when going down the rabbit hole it became a different time zone. In fact
there was 1 hour and 40 minute difference. March Hare needed to set his alarm
clock 1 hour and 40 minutes sooner, but he wasn’t sure when that would be. So
Jerry the Cat asked him when he usually wakes up. March Hare told him he always
gets up at 7:30 so they had to subtract 1 hour and 40 minutes from that time.
They said 1 hour earlier was 6:30, but they still needed to subtract 40 minutes
from that. They realized after they subtracted 30 more minutes that they were
still 10 minutes off. So Jerry the Cat said, “6:00 minus 10 minutes equals
5:50.” Then a very appreciative rabbit started to hop away while Jerry the Cat
headed to work. He also figured out a way to get to work on time, which was to
stop taking this route. </b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJAzxNK58PlXf5SBlRWF0xueaPzGhX7z1EglJy_VLFYbjygv1plh9sjxj3kvEAR-I2PkXdLQOT0bT5SzFwG_aA-brKpOjuy6A6N9uP3AlPDXPDcJJsyfUFuLyLLeQAkXtsNQV6Eg/s1600/IMG_0947.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJAzxNK58PlXf5SBlRWF0xueaPzGhX7z1EglJy_VLFYbjygv1plh9sjxj3kvEAR-I2PkXdLQOT0bT5SzFwG_aA-brKpOjuy6A6N9uP3AlPDXPDcJJsyfUFuLyLLeQAkXtsNQV6Eg/s320/IMG_0947.JPG" width="238" /></a></div>
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I love my smart and creative Red Head! </span></b></div>
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<!--EndFragment-->Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-57932911468050176772012-04-11T16:29:00.000-05:002012-04-11T16:29:28.063-05:00Easter Pictures<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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We took Easter pictures the other day (just like the rest of the people did on Facebook.) </div>
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I could have posted all the perfect pictures with the kid's eyes open and everyone smiling and looking at the camera but that wouldn't be any fun for you to look at. </div>
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Sooooo....here are some Out Takes from our Easter Portrait session. </div>
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(Photos taken by various members of our own family with my iPhone.) </div>
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First up we have Randy with the girls...I kept making him stand up straight because he kept hunching over. Here Randy is over dramatizing the hunch. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj47MOd2d1KDtpSQ4cuOMFJOqWTwr2gt7Kl6IPxH6pZp8jRCD6K26p8OQ8KEMmf8JipWiqymNlukt9n3ddLYsfN-2AVrmVIPkGw9fqNaPR7Rea6_bQ_q3caUKZVV0NBpN5WYXHIxA/s1600/IMG_0966.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="476" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj47MOd2d1KDtpSQ4cuOMFJOqWTwr2gt7Kl6IPxH6pZp8jRCD6K26p8OQ8KEMmf8JipWiqymNlukt9n3ddLYsfN-2AVrmVIPkGw9fqNaPR7Rea6_bQ_q3caUKZVV0NBpN5WYXHIxA/s640/IMG_0966.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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Who really knows what was going on here. We weren't planning on doing any Charlie's Angel's photos. What I do love here is the genuine laugh coming out of Joey. It cracks me up. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRSbibUIWALxmb1JwYq8aZt6kRhGXgCdfkwi4F7R7u8ZJPLkojN2FPMOIXAhgbLGbFs7NqFnP7ZaHSTLuDPdjHwOAtQHftWr2iYd7Rt3Ge_-K7nAUCpSoYPTJcrH3KOGjYSHwdSA/s1600/IMG_0970.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="478" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRSbibUIWALxmb1JwYq8aZt6kRhGXgCdfkwi4F7R7u8ZJPLkojN2FPMOIXAhgbLGbFs7NqFnP7ZaHSTLuDPdjHwOAtQHftWr2iYd7Rt3Ge_-K7nAUCpSoYPTJcrH3KOGjYSHwdSA/s640/IMG_0970.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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And here we have a picture of Randy trying to imitate "Uncle Rico's photo shoot" on Napoleon Dynamite. I love it. This one is actually a keeper. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_WDCweFoOiIn4jLx-kaMShEoWJL8wO8Cb-Pa5yL9IY7XhyphenhyphenvrwOlQZJ3vxB0FK8WqZ5cXuBTAODk1pxqdJ8pwXRXSdC7HcWpgn56aWL73NdCNIp1404mcnU0Chyphenhyphenly3C7Xzbw1HnQ/s1600/IMG_0972.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_WDCweFoOiIn4jLx-kaMShEoWJL8wO8Cb-Pa5yL9IY7XhyphenhyphenvrwOlQZJ3vxB0FK8WqZ5cXuBTAODk1pxqdJ8pwXRXSdC7HcWpgn56aWL73NdCNIp1404mcnU0Chyphenhyphenly3C7Xzbw1HnQ/s640/IMG_0972.JPG" width="476" /></a></div>
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Here is Spencer later in the day trying to imitate Randy's "Uncle Rico pose." Eyes Shut</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAl8oI504MMHlxW6RO-Tz4TUBHA-CnAVOLpiXBjusYhyFD2JxuczxXkx0eXAIZYkJc3cX9zKFoSAvgLUQuE3V-pYepS3u0bndHEFdObjcodlMc4elFkF7oT0wAUjtTFFGgQTzl4Q/s1600/IMG_1018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAl8oI504MMHlxW6RO-Tz4TUBHA-CnAVOLpiXBjusYhyFD2JxuczxXkx0eXAIZYkJc3cX9zKFoSAvgLUQuE3V-pYepS3u0bndHEFdObjcodlMc4elFkF7oT0wAUjtTFFGgQTzl4Q/s320/IMG_1018.JPG" width="238" /></a></div>
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Cracking up about not trying to crack up.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaUlQ3sYh1sGbtRWpI6pB90KmPTY4Ix1ib_HKuEHN5ufZNnc6UmONouxwGPuYkL-QM_nqOVpqPJ9-gM2n4xLkBWt3QOXZ0lvI8LneIoAa-J6EKtGkSbiQyC3g48y7-YTLcjWhR2w/s1600/IMG_1020.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaUlQ3sYh1sGbtRWpI6pB90KmPTY4Ix1ib_HKuEHN5ufZNnc6UmONouxwGPuYkL-QM_nqOVpqPJ9-gM2n4xLkBWt3QOXZ0lvI8LneIoAa-J6EKtGkSbiQyC3g48y7-YTLcjWhR2w/s320/IMG_1020.JPG" width="238" /></a></div>
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Trying to keep a straight face. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ4ntfOHi1im29Y3F2HJSExWoLIhU1A7QkIRPeCxIQSGxw4vSjrcxqyfJqE620QJJkDEBNcPrS7I59dWLUV5jFgwSMfCnRarDovKtgOKrmvqyf9k948-Y5_YvkFiaalADypGKj5g/s1600/IMG_1021.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ4ntfOHi1im29Y3F2HJSExWoLIhU1A7QkIRPeCxIQSGxw4vSjrcxqyfJqE620QJJkDEBNcPrS7I59dWLUV5jFgwSMfCnRarDovKtgOKrmvqyf9k948-Y5_YvkFiaalADypGKj5g/s320/IMG_1021.JPG" width="238" /></a></div>
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YES! Here we go! Spencer's impression of Randy's impression of Uncle Rico. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOFKIdu4u0hkDjdZeWSNMudfsQpGDDhKcUOW4Bcoe9O1ZihlHjz8B5nYLQVZaQBFEjWSzEvHM6nMnRTwQ3RVTvPy2bjpH1rijNrqlceDLeMXM9Qoj8uD8NoZBHfNyPTWEYnD4Qdg/s1600/IMG_1022.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOFKIdu4u0hkDjdZeWSNMudfsQpGDDhKcUOW4Bcoe9O1ZihlHjz8B5nYLQVZaQBFEjWSzEvHM6nMnRTwQ3RVTvPy2bjpH1rijNrqlceDLeMXM9Qoj8uD8NoZBHfNyPTWEYnD4Qdg/s320/IMG_1022.JPG" width="238" /></a></div>
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This one is just a fail all the way around. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7eSdSVq8ued0mVAIkzdt7yTvibITorGgWhDnTBCvVnXHBQctUSDU6BD4rr8zOBMVPWCal6btmR373IJ4VQxn8VuW_3bpWP9J3h0L7hfuwSIycFbYp-3ZTicID-UNWV_c60Z4kBg/s1600/IMG_1032.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="478" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7eSdSVq8ued0mVAIkzdt7yTvibITorGgWhDnTBCvVnXHBQctUSDU6BD4rr8zOBMVPWCal6btmR373IJ4VQxn8VuW_3bpWP9J3h0L7hfuwSIycFbYp-3ZTicID-UNWV_c60Z4kBg/s640/IMG_1032.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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This photo is what you call an ALMOST. Almost everyone had their eyes open. Now this picture happens to be Spencer with his eyes closed but it could have been any number of other photos with one of the other kid's eyes closed. Thank goodness for digital cameras! </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSmYU4Sy2PZ51eazGJhYPQr4EBbTfNBoa2sWbNlg7ZsnstbXuuo8gYAu2pvz5m-c4xEvbJq68Pv56EPmkscXidXNFKtuQJTHBEY0RlTnD7FVT09fGPvpgwDi9gJDCCfVwvaxEMlA/s1600/IMG_1053.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSmYU4Sy2PZ51eazGJhYPQr4EBbTfNBoa2sWbNlg7ZsnstbXuuo8gYAu2pvz5m-c4xEvbJq68Pv56EPmkscXidXNFKtuQJTHBEY0RlTnD7FVT09fGPvpgwDi9gJDCCfVwvaxEMlA/s640/IMG_1053.JPG" width="476" /></a></div>
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This one isn't so much of an out take photo. It's just that they boys are getting so tall that by next Easter I think I will be a front row girl and the boys will have to be behind me. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6kZ1QSdiTGIN5y4qTJz0UUwHEj_OFEWfNeZ6Q3XURjWGkdMjSkvHSE2TxoYKCe_JCozvNqN2Ljg_HerRNKEiuZGBxopR48QuifQVH6zCWo2T7D_9N_7kTVUxzB2zUyjtrB3NOSQ/s1600/IMG_0980.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6kZ1QSdiTGIN5y4qTJz0UUwHEj_OFEWfNeZ6Q3XURjWGkdMjSkvHSE2TxoYKCe_JCozvNqN2Ljg_HerRNKEiuZGBxopR48QuifQVH6zCWo2T7D_9N_7kTVUxzB2zUyjtrB3NOSQ/s640/IMG_0980.JPG" width="476" /></a></div>
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This one is an out take! It wouldn't have been fair to put a whole lot of bad pictures of everyone without adding one of me. This is when I was trying to get Spencer into the right position and he began to wrestle me and pull my hair! </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGHFwgRkEyK-lcXsQFfWGo9edUWNFhVgSjEMCP2txyeFxs9AksTWusmQU7K-9yNErli88kGM4IaI6OergU9hsEU6yS0pNy0IseFC8EGL3pUhVmw_RHGtvAwBBuaMkBh2yvO-t71w/s1600/IMG_1003.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGHFwgRkEyK-lcXsQFfWGo9edUWNFhVgSjEMCP2txyeFxs9AksTWusmQU7K-9yNErli88kGM4IaI6OergU9hsEU6yS0pNy0IseFC8EGL3pUhVmw_RHGtvAwBBuaMkBh2yvO-t71w/s640/IMG_1003.JPG" width="476" /></a></div>
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This was not planned. I was trying to take a picture of the girls together when Spencer jumped in front of the camera in the last second. I have several of these sort of pics as well. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPABuaqrykAolfTuaDvAaf8TLyeGNKHizPA_tcVqHxgqbJOEnhqLgox8tbBvj4g75uc257PBR_Kmxp2Wc8xFeq_2smV50wmQhD6y7xkfvg7GPK3YSM2AhlcXdUHDT4hZeoPxy49A/s1600/IMG_1050.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPABuaqrykAolfTuaDvAaf8TLyeGNKHizPA_tcVqHxgqbJOEnhqLgox8tbBvj4g75uc257PBR_Kmxp2Wc8xFeq_2smV50wmQhD6y7xkfvg7GPK3YSM2AhlcXdUHDT4hZeoPxy49A/s640/IMG_1050.JPG" width="476" /></a></div>
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Now here are some of the cute ones<strike> to bore you to death </strike>for you to enjoy. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifj8rynTh4mKIxZC72xGkXUzkLILemxeGgUfMKsZGOSSExmj48loey8Z6rivHrffzlDyDci4z7fMFmkWxD0sy1nMhO0zd7v1K3MO_22kQYlwHIuHnvwp_0tTfeVnXwUjd0yLmXPQ/s1600/IMG_1010.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifj8rynTh4mKIxZC72xGkXUzkLILemxeGgUfMKsZGOSSExmj48loey8Z6rivHrffzlDyDci4z7fMFmkWxD0sy1nMhO0zd7v1K3MO_22kQYlwHIuHnvwp_0tTfeVnXwUjd0yLmXPQ/s640/IMG_1010.JPG" width="476" /></a></div>
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<br />Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-82817089042140103452012-03-09T12:59:00.001-06:002012-03-09T12:59:23.472-06:00Spring Break!<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lime; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Spring Break has officially started! </b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lime; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lime; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I'm excited that we have no plans at all! I'm looking forward to hanging out with the kids and seeing where the week takes us. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lime; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lime; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The girls have been home for less than an hour and they're already in the middle of a painting project. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lime; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Hopefully this week will include: Sleeping in, watching movies, going to the dog park, coloring, taking pictures, crafty things, riding bikes, relaxing and lots of laughing. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lime; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Hopefully this week will not include: Arguing, declaration of boredom and constant hunger. : ) </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5NU7QXtkur1b8I0hqWNhC_sM3eYgzi_QZNFkbdhVih9BtbOjMkrbvbbL4YwzFdShr9Hoh7GDgrJnGMD2lwMJRcFeTNsgRUPUB3UVYwe1hLW7mfOAzUqslZydmJX_DV0-TSJ4qpA/s1600/Spring-Break-Sun.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="291" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5NU7QXtkur1b8I0hqWNhC_sM3eYgzi_QZNFkbdhVih9BtbOjMkrbvbbL4YwzFdShr9Hoh7GDgrJnGMD2lwMJRcFeTNsgRUPUB3UVYwe1hLW7mfOAzUqslZydmJX_DV0-TSJ4qpA/s320/Spring-Break-Sun.gif" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-92113739143264157152012-02-23T10:27:00.000-06:002012-02-23T10:27:07.775-06:00A Picture...Something I really wish I had was one great picture of Miles and I together. I'm the picture taker around here so I don't have one. I have amazing pictures of Miles. I have some pictures I treasure of Miles with the kids and Randy. I just don't have one of me with him.<br />
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I would love a picture of me snuggled up in his bed with my head on his shoulder and my arm around him. That seems to be the spot I miss most. I loved the way his pajamas felt.<br />
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I wish there was a plain everyday picture of Randy and I working together in the evenings doing Miles's night routine. Years and years we chose Miles over our own exhaustion to do all the things he needed to survive. There were so many things that had to be done at night and we did them every night. Medicines ready, catheter, night feeds, breathing treatments and The Vest. I wish I would have thought to have the kids take a quick snapshot of us.<br />
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On the last Mother's Day he was here I kept thinking I wanted Randy to take a picture of me with all five of the kids. It ended up being one of the crappiest days and I never got him to do it. Miles died 2 weeks later and I don't have that picture with just me and my babies.<br />
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I wish there was an unposed photo of me in the hospital with Miles. One where I was just doing the stuff I had to do. One that showed how intense the situation was yet also somehow showed the peace I had. I have lots of pictures with Miles and Randy in the hospital and shots of Miles and the kids at the hospital, but none of me and Miles. I was there almost every minute of every hospital stay. Not one photo.<br />
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I wish I had a picture of Miles and I at the waiting room in Dr. Wiley's office. We were there so often. Sometimes once a week (sometimes even more than that.) I would sit at the edge of my chair and have his wheelchair sideways in front of me. I would pat his chest and make him smile. If he was asleep I would prop my arms up on his wheelchair and read or play on my phone. I have that picture in my head now, but I know in time it will probably fade away and I want to remember it.<br />
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I would love to have a photo of me singing over Miles when he didn't feel good, in the hospital or after surgeries. I would often sing, "Jesus. Jesus. Jeeeeesssus. There's just something about that name. Master, Savior, Jesus like the fragrance after the rain. Kings and Kingdoms will all wash away. There's just something about that name." I would also sing, "Jesus' blood never failed you yet. Never failed you yet. Jesus' blood never failed you yet. This one thing I know...That he loves you so."<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgodSeqXVACBBRTaK71-r_mKwpA_-fOATWySc9QJOaXx6YDYVcOXBuDKKK8ES8y_fgdcIN3w-SSvxYFThXRmeU6992ZTQ1Wr0Gzq-OPy2rIRXZhrhdp6k3KIAXDA0dGE8_L1Q-kwg/s1600/DSCF0018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgodSeqXVACBBRTaK71-r_mKwpA_-fOATWySc9QJOaXx6YDYVcOXBuDKKK8ES8y_fgdcIN3w-SSvxYFThXRmeU6992ZTQ1Wr0Gzq-OPy2rIRXZhrhdp6k3KIAXDA0dGE8_L1Q-kwg/s320/DSCF0018.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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I wish there was a picture of us where we're both just happy and smiling. As heartbreaking as so many situations were during his lifetime there were infinitely more situations where love conquered all, where peace passed all understanding and the joy of the Lord was our strength. I wish I had a picture of us just enjoying being together.<br />
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With all my heart I wish I had a picture of Miles next to me at church. During worship I would hold his hand and lift my own. I was always praying for him and singing over him. I still feel so off balanced without him at church. For years I had his sweet hand to hold on to.<br />
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Lord, please help me to keep these pictures in my heart and mind to remind me of how fiercely I loved him.Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-46148239177005314332012-02-21T17:37:00.000-06:002012-02-21T17:37:32.541-06:00Really? : )<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">A few times last week I noticed
that Melody’s bra was riding up and making things look weird. She doesn’t wear
real bras but little sporty tank top bras. Anyway, like I said I noticed that “things”
weren’t looking right. I had to keep telling her to pull her bra down. She told
me that she had to keep pulling it down all day long. I decided she must have
outgrown hers and needed some new ones. When I was at the store I was looking
at the little girl sport bras. I couldn’t figure out the right size so I
decided to wait until Monday (yesterday) to take her with me to the store to
make sure and get the correct fit. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Well, yesterday flew by and I never
did make it to the store with her. Last night Jocie asked me if she wanted me
to just let Melody borrow some of her bras until I got to the store. I told her
that would be great, but Melody complained that she doesn’t like Jocie’s. I
told her that she would just have to wear Jocie’s until I got to the store. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Last night before bed she came into
the kitchen where Randy and I were. She only had her sleep shorts and one of
Jocie’s bras on. She walked in and immediately I said, “Oh gosh! You’re right!
Those do not fit right!” The fit was very awkward and pointless. Randy said, “Um,
isn’t it just on backwards?” </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I helped Melody turn it around and
it fit perfect. It was on backwards! She insisted that’s the way Jocie told her
to put it on…with the white side in the back. I went to Jocie’s room to talk to
her and make sure she wasn’t wearing her bras backwards. Jocie said that she
didn’t tell Melody that and she doesn’t wear them like that. So, I showed
Melody some of her bras and asked her how she would put them on and The Girl
Has Been Wearing Them Backwards!!! We were all laughing so hard. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">When I picked the girls up from
school today Melody immediately told me, “Man, my bra fits sooooo much better!
I didn’t have to pull it down one time today!” </span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-15080920229647456212012-02-15T16:41:00.000-06:002012-02-15T16:50:01.143-06:00iPad Drama : )<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Once upon a time, several months back my awesome brother-in-law Richard...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVug6E6_TfHkeLGhl8lvEqTXYinT_naGIaov9AC6XFf5KtHSTleLSyJmDp_RXsrJdwyL9V9qMcd2SoPNPEs49unZ_GqbJ9UIafYdo49UXHUB4XYwARZepAZcAfx20CQEaCQdCwKA/s1600/richard.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVug6E6_TfHkeLGhl8lvEqTXYinT_naGIaov9AC6XFf5KtHSTleLSyJmDp_RXsrJdwyL9V9qMcd2SoPNPEs49unZ_GqbJ9UIafYdo49UXHUB4XYwARZepAZcAfx20CQEaCQdCwKA/s320/richard.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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bought me an iPad!!!</div>
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Yes Richard, I had to steal your only Facebook photo. </div>
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Well, a few months ago my eldest son Joey may or <strike>may not have</strike>...dropped said iPad thus breaking the sound button. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCc6s_Z5kwqtfZ3greDRL1364RmOzDbzUsj2ENN6uP7yaUqkZ90FZrZT96H1dVYYgWmhjmtLNDqJSNTk5rdLlu99ve1fKL_T-5L0X1D95FI4cAuWPyerKeCt74QkkdixQ9RnuAyQ/s1600/IMG_0496.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCc6s_Z5kwqtfZ3greDRL1364RmOzDbzUsj2ENN6uP7yaUqkZ90FZrZT96H1dVYYgWmhjmtLNDqJSNTk5rdLlu99ve1fKL_T-5L0X1D95FI4cAuWPyerKeCt74QkkdixQ9RnuAyQ/s320/IMG_0496.JPG" width="238" /></a></div>
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This made Joey very sad. </div>
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Well, Randy, my beloved husband can fix anything right?!? I mean he can build a whole house from start to finish! He can fix bikes, plumbing and gates that hang wrong! Surely, he can fix an iPad button! He took his trusty screw driver to fix the button and....</div>
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<b>Oopsi! He cracked the iPad screen! </b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8-U1oOsaY-pdSm7C7r9r_CKzPPyZbnFxzKGKzxCjSuAEwjzFYPrN7GXXMmmZxnv8YcaHMiiWgBbLhbbsJlGfVDaVu5gfECteYhBbuuApPUccgVk3IibLLClD4AR06pFs5-vIntQ/s1600/IMG_0492.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8-U1oOsaY-pdSm7C7r9r_CKzPPyZbnFxzKGKzxCjSuAEwjzFYPrN7GXXMmmZxnv8YcaHMiiWgBbLhbbsJlGfVDaVu5gfECteYhBbuuApPUccgVk3IibLLClD4AR06pFs5-vIntQ/s320/IMG_0492.JPG" width="238" /></a></div>
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Now, my photo isn't available from when this happened. Who even remembers what I said exactly? There's rumor that I crumbled up the pie crust I was working on, chunked it in the kitchen sink and went out for a breather, but I'm pretty sure that doesn't sound like me! Don't you agree? I probably....</div>
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said something dainty like, "Oh sweetheart, thanks for giving it a try! You're so loved and appreciated." </div>
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Well, to fix the iPad screen by a place in town was quoted at $160. That wasn't going to happen anytime soon. The iPad was put on a high shelf while we waited on the $160 fairy to drop by the house. A couple of weeks went by and we were still waiting so I took it off the high shelf and began to play with it. I figured out that it was still useable if you didn't mind a tiny piece of glass in your finger every once in a while. </div>
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I didn't let the kids play with it since I wanted to protect their delicate fingers from the glass! It wasn't all bad having the screen cracked. I actually got a lot more play time with the iPad because I didn't have to share it with all the little people. (Glass half full kind of girl!) </div>
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Anywho...</div>
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One day Randy is looking on eBay and finds a <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Do It Yourself Kit</span> to replace the iPad screen. </div>
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Um....how do I put this nicely?</div>
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NNNoooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!</div>
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Randy decided to look on Youtube to find an instructional video on replacing the screen (laymen's term) Digitizer (professional term.) He found a video...</div>
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<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_jnE5ULjpEQ">Digitizer Replacement Video</a></div>
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Now, I was sitting next to him while he watched the 14 minute video. All I could hear over and over again was, "Watch out! Make sure you don't break the blah blah blah." </div>
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All he heard was, "Oh yeah, I could fix it!" </div>
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He bought the kit off eBay for $46 (including shipping) from Hong Kong and a couple of weeks later this arrived...</div>
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Yes, that's a photo of a tiny baby suction cup. </div>
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He sat down at the kitchen table THAT HE BUILT FROM A TREE IN OUR YARD...</div>
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and He Fixed it!!! </div>
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Now I can get back to playing mindless games on the iPad with sound! Yeah, he fixed the sound button too! </div>
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After he was done I mentioned to him that he could totally do this sort of thing as a side business! iPad and iPhone screens crack all the time! He saved us a ton of money! He just gave me "the look." That business isn't going to happen...BUT if it ever does...I'm going to have a Side Side Business by placing one of these babies in his iPad screen fixing shop!</div>
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I would make some bank!</div>
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End of the story? Not quite yet. </div>
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I told the kids they couldn't play with the iPad again until we saved enough money to buy an Otter Box for the iPad. </div>
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We are well on our way! : ) </div>
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(Picture taken today with iPad!) </div>Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-73872251423330426122012-02-03T14:43:00.001-06:002012-02-03T18:55:32.646-06:00Exciting!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>Ok Everyone...Lay Hands on this application and pray with me! </b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">I'm about to fill out an application for Cornerstone Christian School to teach <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;"><b style="background-color: blue;">KINDERGARTEN</b> </span>in the fall! I'm so excited! For those that have known me for a long time you know that it's been my heart's desire to teach this class! The current teacher, and one of my amazing mentors is retiring this year. She's been telling me for years that she hopes I will be her replacement. I do too! </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">I love the age of the kids in Pre-K and Kindergarten. They are so teachable. They love their teachers and learning new things. They love singing songs and being silly. Maybe that's why I feel so at home with them. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: red;">: )</span> I've subbed in that class for years and I've also been a teacher's aide part time. I've worked with kids for money and I've worked for free and either way it brings me great joy. I just feel good when I'm in that setting. I love encouraging the kids to do well. I love teaching them new things. I love hearing their funny stories and their take on things. I love how full of faith and love they are. Several times while being a teacher's aide I caught myself thinking, "I could easily do this for the rest of my life." It just feels like a perfect fit. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">For the last 14 years I've been at home with my own precious babies. I'm so thankful I was able to stay at home with them. The Lord has been so faithful to us financially to help us raise 5 children on a one person income. It's funny, I think about over the years, having 5 children in 6 years and having them running all over the house. It was a sweet time in those early years. Not everyday was smooth sailing, but most days were filled with giggles, games and giant messes. I wouldn't trade those times! Then we moved into small school age children, reading books and lots of crafty stuff. Next up was 4 of the kids in school while I stayed at home with Miles. Those days were filled with doctor visits, lunch dates and lots of snuggling. Now, it's a new season for all of us, but especially me.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">I had a couple of tiny jobs before I had kids while I was in college, but for the most part I've never had a real job. I watered plants for a flower shop. I was a nail technician for a little while when Randy and I were first married. My first job was selling the newspaper over the phone. (I wasn't so great at that.) I've volunteered a lot though at the kid's school over the years and also in children's church. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">My lack of job experience seemed like a "Goliath" to me until I realized that if I'm supposed to get the job then none of the rest will even matter. God will put me exactly where He wants me! I have no doubt about that. I totally trust Him to give me the job or to totally prevent me from getting it if He has other plans for me! That's what is so exciting to me! I know that I will either be teaching Kindergarten next year which has been a huge dream and goal of mine OR He has something else beautiful in store for me. I don't feel any pressure about it at all. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">I do have one precious thought that keeps coming to mind though...<i><b>Isn't it just like the Lord to give me lots and lots of children over the next several years to replace the one beautiful child I lost?</b> </i>I don't really mean replace, but you know what I mean. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Anyway, I didn't plan on writing all that. I'm just excited. I've been subbing the last 3 weeks in the Pre-K class. During that time there's been a lot of talk lately about the possibility of me being the Kindergarten teacher next year and it has been a great excitement for me. It's been healing to have something to look forward to after these last several months of deep mourning. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><i>Joy instead of mourning. </i></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><i>Beauty for ashes. </i></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><i>Praise instead of despair.</i> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">(That's what the thought of teaching does for my soul.) </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">So, dear sweet friends of mine...<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: yellow;">will you pray for me? Will you agree with me that if I'm supposed to be the new Kindergarten teacher for Cornerstone Christian School next year, that I WILL BE?</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><br /></span>Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-68253697973297756412012-01-31T14:18:00.000-06:002012-01-31T14:18:02.217-06:00JOY<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">God has bound my broken heart. He has proclaimed freedom for this captive. He has released me from darkness. God has comforted me as I've mourned. He's giving me beauty for ashes and joy instead of mourning. God has given me the ability to praise instead of despair. I will be called an oak of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor. </span><div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I'm not saying that everyday is perfect. It's not. I still cry often and miss Miles. I'm still struggling with bad dreams at night where I dig Miles up from the ground and try to keep him alive. I still have "off" days. However, in the last month Isaiah 61:1-4 has been true in my life. Hope for a future is being restored in me. I'm enjoying my day to day more. I'm excited about current things and things to come. I can breathe deeper and see clearer. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I've always been a "happy-go-lucky" or "glass half full" kind of girl. I've always been joyful. Until recently though I never knew what a beautiful gift JOY really is. I just always had it. Even when things were really rough growing up I still had joy. I took it for granted. I've always heard the verse about the joy of the Lord being our strength, but again, I took it for granted. I don't ever want to take that beautiful gift of JOY for granted again. Philippians 4:4 says, "Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again--rejoice!"</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">That is one amazing lesson I learned from Miles. That kid was either asleep or full of joy. He had no in between. What a marvelous way to live! Asleep or Joyfull! Even though Miles never did say a word or even take one little step on his own two feet...in many ways he had it all figured out. </span></div>
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Here he's managing to be both asleep and joyful at the same time. : ) </div>
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Overachiever! </div>Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-80842224689643282302012-01-23T17:17:00.002-06:002012-01-23T17:17:41.222-06:00Jocie's 10th Birthday!!!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Today is my beautiful Jocie's 10th Birthday! I can hardly believe she's 10. She still seems like such a little girl to me. She has the sweetest spirit. I'm so thankful for that. This afternoon she wrote a letter to God and she shared it with me. I just had to share it with you. It's a peek into her gentle and loving soul. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Dear God, </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Thank you for being here for me and for my family in our hard times. We wouldn't be here without you God. It's been hard ever since Miles died and you've cheered us up. My best friend Larissa just left school and now I'm the only girl in my class. We're going to Fountaingate Fellowship and my friend goes to church there. I like going there but its hard because I miss Grace Point. My family can eat out once a week because of our budget. I'm liking it because we've tried different things like country grits and sausage casserole. I love you God and I should start talking to you more often. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Love, Jocie</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Thank you Lord for my precious Jocie girl! </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-60477781407295078022012-01-16T21:54:00.000-06:002012-01-16T21:54:56.576-06:00Good Grief Group Charlie BrownTonight I went to the first of 8 classes at Beltway for people dealing with the death of a loved one.<br />
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Man, who thought, "Let's get a bunch of depressed people together, talk about extremely depressing things and people will feel better?"<br />
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I met a couple that lost their son the same month as I lost Miles. It's a strange feeling. I was sitting by two people that actually Know what I've been dealing with and feeling. I wanted to push pause on the meeting, forget all social norms about sharing intimate details with strangers, and really talk about how incredibly hard it is to lose a child.<br />
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I had the sensation of what I think it must feel like for a person in a foreign land to run into someone from their hometown. I wanted to go over details and cry with them and for them. I wanted to find out how they have made it so far and find out what areas they really aren't making it. Yes, there were other people in the room, and some of them even had lost their child, but I think I was drawn to them since it's been the exact amount of time passed since our sons have died.<br />
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The mom did give me her number. I doubt I will call her. Still, it was nice of her to give it to me.<br />
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I'm glad I went even though it was sort of torturous. Almost as soon as I got there my throat closed up. The whole time it felt like if I opened my mouth and dared to speak Miles's name that I would begin to cry and not be able to stop. Several times I pictured myself getting up and running to the car. I wanted to escape, yet I also wanted to stay.<br />
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Today they talked about the 5 stages of Grief:<br />
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<ul>
<li>Denial</li>
<li>Anger</li>
<li>Bargaining</li>
<li>Depression</li>
<li>Acceptance</li>
</ul>
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I'm stuck momentarily at the Depression stage. Recently, I have had moments of feeling like myself. That makes me hopeful. I'm still not there though. I'm trying to be patient with myself, but it's hard because who in the world enjoys feeling so miserable all the time? I don't. It's frustrating to want to live life, but feel like you're stuck and not able to move forward. </div>
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I plan on going through the rest of the sessions. I feel like it's at least something I can do to try and feel better. Also, I will hopefully be able to get to know some people that truly understand how I'm feeling. Plus, what else is there to do on Monday nights? </div>Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-31915463103600671492012-01-13T10:18:00.000-06:002012-01-13T10:18:20.781-06:00For King & Country Busted Heart *LYRICS*<iframe width="480" height="270" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/4FdAB2FUFv4?fs=1" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-17825744232268965602011-10-21T16:50:00.001-05:002011-10-21T16:50:25.852-05:005 Months<div style="text-align: center;">
5 Months</div>
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Today makes 5 months since Miles died. </div>
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5 months.</div>
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5 really long, sad and draining months. </div>
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This process of grieving really sucks. I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel yet, but I'm convinced that it's not always going to be this hard. I don't know when things will begin to feel better, but I do have confidence that the rest of my life will not feel this dark. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxnkshbW-b6k0EroRdfWE9-dAtU4oQEEH-_-mcm9qEnvd3Nibr9n1LrUgy_DHpVKHfwgCLpw4XOURZALXjLzd_kbWQgqgYPVUKLp_OQ64Epx66eHNs8rBd0DciOMHX6v-v4YbtWg/s1600/SprintPhoto_bwwdbo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxnkshbW-b6k0EroRdfWE9-dAtU4oQEEH-_-mcm9qEnvd3Nibr9n1LrUgy_DHpVKHfwgCLpw4XOURZALXjLzd_kbWQgqgYPVUKLp_OQ64Epx66eHNs8rBd0DciOMHX6v-v4YbtWg/s320/SprintPhoto_bwwdbo.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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I miss Miles, and I miss Me. I miss feeling like me. </div>
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<br /></div>Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-29172395783151345922011-10-05T11:58:00.000-05:002011-10-05T11:58:22.026-05:00Mourning<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoETjctMNCUhJESZKyPxiwMgAuDS3Z3gEzRq9qRhlSIUwZzp9Objrl2ykZp5h2jBSioKacWdN2cXvouX6bavISdTnlwdjvFMyzAbWHdgztM7-AwiUT6zZ_v8ZH-wh25VkOBtU4yg/s1600/angel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoETjctMNCUhJESZKyPxiwMgAuDS3Z3gEzRq9qRhlSIUwZzp9Objrl2ykZp5h2jBSioKacWdN2cXvouX6bavISdTnlwdjvFMyzAbWHdgztM7-AwiUT6zZ_v8ZH-wh25VkOBtU4yg/s640/angel.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<b><br /></b></div>
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<b>My life is poured out like water, </b></div>
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<b>and all of my bones are out of joint.</b></div>
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<b><u>My heart is like wax, </u></b></div>
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<b><u>melting within me.</u></b></div>
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<b>My strength has dried up like</b></div>
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<b>sunbaked clay.</b></div>
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<b>My tongue sticks to the roof of my</b></div>
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<b>mouth.</b></div>
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<b>You have laid me in the dust</b></div>
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<b>and left me for dead. </b></div>
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Psalm 22:14-15</div>
<br />Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-70118412710879282112011-10-01T19:21:00.000-05:002011-10-01T19:21:39.458-05:00Middle School Dance<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkaWrfhwRNdCRwBxXaDix2HDZE_WYSVAK1HKblKA10SIpKJHgHUaMx06GqFOEoYFSQWyUgOXeBTzvmZyW7lN8ngl9BupowImvSidpefitTzLGkRxRm3HZ3SSEWvnLl0rvNBPSlfA/s1600/napoleonDynamite.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkaWrfhwRNdCRwBxXaDix2HDZE_WYSVAK1HKblKA10SIpKJHgHUaMx06GqFOEoYFSQWyUgOXeBTzvmZyW7lN8ngl9BupowImvSidpefitTzLGkRxRm3HZ3SSEWvnLl0rvNBPSlfA/s320/napoleonDynamite.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Randy and I were asked to be chaperones for the Fun Night at the boy's middle school. We agreed to do it. The Fun Night has all kinds of games to play, food to eat and basketball. It also has a Dance, and lucky us...we were asked to chaperone the dance. The PTA lady said, "Would you mind doing the dance? No one ever wants to the dance! It's really loud in there and you have to make sure the kids aren't dancing too close and all that." We told her that we would do it.</div>
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Well, here's the summary of the evening:</div>
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<ul>
<li>I got to break up a cat fight in the girls bathroom. </li>
<li>A girl had an actual seizure. Randy had to carry her out and wait for help to arrive.</li>
<li>We had to break up major girl on girl nasty dancing. </li>
</ul>
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and last but totally not least...</div>
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<ul>
<li>Later one of the girl dancers we broke up came up to Randy and told him that he sucks balls.</li>
</ul>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
</div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>So....obviously the night Rocked Our Faces Off! </b></span></div>
Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-29296215081332906972011-09-28T17:23:00.000-05:002011-09-28T17:25:14.054-05:00It's almost his birthday.Next Wednesday would be Miles's birthday. He would turn 7.<br />
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I've thought that no less than 30 times today and yesterday and Saturday.<br />
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The thought of him not being here to celebrate his life takes my own breath away.<br />
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How am I going to get through that day?<br />
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We won't be able to give him Cotton Candy, which is the only thing we could give him because it would just dissolve on his tongue. He won't be here to take to the zoo. I usually used his birthday money from his aunt and uncle to buy a yearly zoo pass and then we would take him to the zoo. He loved being pushed around in his wheelchair outside. He won't be here to get all these kisses and hugs we have stored up for him.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu9g-PZmGWalSQmdWlHXYYRzjuL6uyBqH-hrx7BJvhib0cg5Gr5dr5zsThSa6hrW5i8osZ3kvDnlCijEptveZMrDtYlpseIsCr1RtXU36KOEF5PS3JKecQSAWiE0vAhqiO3nWnfQ/s1600/DSCF0007.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu9g-PZmGWalSQmdWlHXYYRzjuL6uyBqH-hrx7BJvhib0cg5Gr5dr5zsThSa6hrW5i8osZ3kvDnlCijEptveZMrDtYlpseIsCr1RtXU36KOEF5PS3JKecQSAWiE0vAhqiO3nWnfQ/s400/DSCF0007.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
It's not getting easier to be without him.<br />
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Is it possible that it's getting harder?<br />
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I'm walking around and going about my day, but it feels like my heart is aching with such intensity that I'm surprised other people can't feel it. It's so strong in me that it seems like it should be contagious.<br />
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How is it possible that all the days I have left on earth will be without that sweet face to kiss? It will be without his perfect curly hair and his innocent spirit.Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-13141778362584395582011-09-21T18:49:00.002-05:002011-09-21T18:49:32.504-05:004 Months<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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4 Months.</div>
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It's been 4 Months since Miles died. </div>
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Here are some quotes that Inspire Me a little to keep going </div>
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or quotes that bring some Truth to my situation. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGhvrYADHeVklPKkbwcXP1tE6sVo42z-TNdaWToANHMUyVzj1dfXDCPfdihVEVO4Gx2vf2WteR6Wa3GEmb4qYuMeO0Gy-Kh8EAH67q1nCmE0Bb3CpWC1pL6ArERoW_lKKVDWbXfw/s1600/quote1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGhvrYADHeVklPKkbwcXP1tE6sVo42z-TNdaWToANHMUyVzj1dfXDCPfdihVEVO4Gx2vf2WteR6Wa3GEmb4qYuMeO0Gy-Kh8EAH67q1nCmE0Bb3CpWC1pL6ArERoW_lKKVDWbXfw/s1600/quote1.jpg" /></a></div>
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<br />Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-86403900473980354982011-09-20T15:25:00.001-05:002011-09-20T15:52:26.391-05:00Pearl Street<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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(Photo from Silvia Pettem's book called "Positively Pearl Street." </div>
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This morning I got to go window shopping in downtown Boulder, Colorado on Pearl St. </div>
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In the evenings, especially the weekends it's usually packed with people and street entertainers. This morning it was mainly locals. Pearl Street is a great mix of Hippies, Yuppies, Homeless, Tourists and Weirdos. There's lots of coffee shops and bookstores. There's art galleries and neat places to shop. Bars, clothing shops, lots of places to eat. They have shops where you could buy trinkets and places where something could cost you a month's salary. </div>
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I couldn't find the Hotel Boulderado to snap a picture, but I did find this little plaque that talked about the hotel. Several years ago Miss Melody was made here. : ) </div>
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Shopping and Mountains. </div>
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Pearl Street is a fun place to shop, eat and people watch...and make Melody's. </div>
Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-80821235527913548872011-09-16T17:21:00.000-05:002011-09-16T17:21:20.826-05:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Ugh, bad dreams.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I dream about Miles almost every night. The dreams usually have the same theme, but alter a little bit. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Several times I've dreamt that we forgot to bury Miles. I've dreamt that I went to the cemetery and unburied him because I felt like he was still alive. One time I dreamt that I had him back for a minute, but then he died again. Recently I had a dream that he was healed, but then he died. Last night I dreamt that I knew Miles had died, but I never did bury him and we just kept carrying him around in the wheelchair and acting like he was still alive. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The dreams are not uplifting. They aren't as devastating as they were at first, but at this point I'm dreading going to sleep and having another dream about him being buried or not. </span>
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I Miss Him. </div>
Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-71515917799327562212011-09-15T17:08:00.000-05:002011-09-15T17:10:36.723-05:00Lunch Time in Boulder<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This afternoon my sister-in-law and I went to lunch in Downtown Boulder at a place called <a href="http://www.themedboulder.com/menu-lunch.html">Mediterranean Restaurant </a>. The place was really nice and totally not like any place I had been to before. The "thing to do there" is to order a bunch of small appetizers and then share them with everyone on the table. Each of the appetizers were about 3 bites of something. Now, normally when I think of restaurant appetizers I think of cheese sticks or something else fried. That's not the case here. These foods were so exotic (to me) that after looking over the menu for a minute I asked if she would just pick out what to order. I felt adventurous enough to try new things, but I also knew that I could have a turkey sandwich at home if I didn't like the food.<br />
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I put a link to the lunch menu, but this is what we shared for lunch:<br />
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<ul>
<li><b>DATILES</b>- Bacon wrapped dates with parsley garlic sauce</li>
<li><b>PINCHON MORUNO</b>- Lamb brochette, calabrain chili mustard & sliced cucumbers</li>
<li><b>CAPRESE-</b> Fresh mozzarella, tomato basil</li>
<li><b>FALAFEL</b>- Chickpea croquette & tahini</li>
<li><b>POLENTA</b>- Crispy Polenta, Avalanche Cheese Co. Midnight Blue Cheese & sherry black pepper honey</li>
<li><b>PROSCIUTTO & MELON</b>- Sliced prosciutto, shaved cantaloupe melon, aged balsamic vinegar & parmesan blend</li>
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Whew! Even my spell check doesn't know what a lot of those things are! I'm serious! I think I ate <b>at least 30 ingredients</b> today that I've never eaten before in my whole life!!! First of all I've never had lamb before. I really liked it. It was a little hard to get out of my head that it was lamb, but the flavor was amazing. The chickpea croquettes were delicious and curious. My favorite was the polenta. It was strange. At first bite the polenta was sweet and then it had a savory texture and flavor and then it left you with a spicy taste in your mouth. It was so delicious. </div>
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This place had a one page front and back menu for the food, but it had a four page front and back menu for the wine and beer. I should have had a glass of wine...I'm still kicking myself over it. However, I had to drive home from Boulder so I didn't want to take any risks, but really, one glass of wine would have been fine. Dang It! I was going to put a link to the wine list, but they just have a downloadable version...I guess because it's so dang long! </div>
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Part of me wants to tell you that the place was Uh-Maz-Ing, and part of my wants to tell you it's WEIRD. I enjoyed the environment, and of course the company. I really enjoyed trying new things without saying, "Ew, that's yucky!" The food was great, but also confusing to my mouth with all the new things going on. I would totally recommend going though. It's a gorgeous restaurant with foods that you don't get to eat everyday. Or in my case...ever. (Until today) </div>
Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-31299150890719782052011-09-14T16:46:00.000-05:002011-09-14T16:46:59.771-05:00A Little Shopping Today<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
I went to a charming little shop this morning. <s>I asked permission</s> I snuck around and snapped some photos of some of my favorite things in the place. </div>
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The shop was in...</div>
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The name of the store is JACQUE MICHELLE. </div>
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If an orange bicycle with a basket full of stuffed animals is in the window then it's pretty much a guarantee that I will like the place. </div>
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My first sneaky photo was of this precious Owl. I heart Owls. (Not the actual Owl animal, but anything decorative or crafty in the way of Owls.) </div>
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Also, I love these kinds of bird decorations. They've grown on me. </div>
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This is why I wanted to start taking pictures in the first place! This picture frame is made from all sorts of old keyboard keys. Later I'm going to post this picture on Pintrest. I just love this frame. It would be fun to make and pretty easy to get a hold of old keyboards at garage sales and Goodwill...or even our storage building. </div>
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Aprons...you know I love aprons. I like to get ideas for new designs when I see them. </div>
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Oh my goodness I Love these hats! Someone locally makes them. They have a crazy price of $75 each. I don't love them that much! It was a perfectly overcast and cool day to purchase such a lovely hat. It makes me want to learn to knit, but I'm not really actively looking for another hobby right now. </div>
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They had lots of unique journals. One of my very favorite things on the planet is stationery products! </div>
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Then my last little fav. from the store is this Awesome Record Cutting Board! How adorable is this? </div>
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Love Love Love it! </div>
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Anyway, I just wanted to share a little Colorado shopping with you today. </div>
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The shopkeeper was <s>delighted</s> clueless at my picture taking. </div>
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I'm sure she wouldn't mind a little free advertising though. </div>
Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-83584754464363817052011-09-07T17:54:00.001-05:002011-09-07T18:05:57.537-05:00Our New Kitchen!Over the Labor Day weekend Randy and I with a lot of help from the kids redecorated our kitchen. While on our wonderful vacation this summer I had the idea of re-doing our kitchen using Vintage Board Games. I spent one whole evening drooling over old board games on eBay. The problem was that they were so dang expensive on there. Even if the games were cheap it was going to be around $10 to ship them. I was slightly bummed until I had the brilliant idea of checking at Goodwill for used games. I spent about a month checking out Goodwill for board games. I found plenty of them! The amazing thing was how cheap they were! It was so fun shopping for them because not one of the games were over $2. Heck, most of them weren't even a dollar. I bought one of them for only 10 cents! I also went to a garage sale and bought several for next to nothing. I'm actually going to miss buying the games because it was so exciting to buy something so cool for so cheap!<br />
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This was a super fun project. It is so cheerful in my kitchen/dining room now. It just feels happy in there. This was my idea and I did help with getting it done...However, it was my husband who deserves a lot of credit on this project! Without him (and all his awesome tools) this kitchen could have come out really cheesy. Randy worked really hard for 2 days, used his tools and a lot of work scraps to make our kitchen come out as cool as it did. That guy has such a great eye for things. He came up with some awesome ways to display things. Basically anything that looks really cool or expensive Randy thought up and made out of nothing. We love doing projects like this together. We feed off each other's creativity.<br />
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This was the first idea that Randy came up with..We bought several Trivial Pursuit games then Randy cut them up into fourths and made a tile design on the wall. This was the first thing we did in the kitchen. I knew we were onto something special after this was done! </div>
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Randy made this awesome Clue display. He ripped down a 2x4 and stained it. It looks so good in person. I made a changeable picture frame out of a Scrabble board. I also put the Community Chest and Chance cards on shelf that I already had in there. Randy made that little box on the shelf. He made it from a Chutes and Ladders game board. I found that idea on Pinterest. Then I filled the jars with the leftover games pieces. </div>
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I love how this Clue board came out. I love that the box is with it. </div>
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I love this stack of shelves. I think it looks so much better in person. </div>
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I painted this little shadow box and filled it with pieces from different games.</div>
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We bought this shelf from Salvation Army. It's a shelf and a chalkboard. Melody and I played tic-tac-toe on it. </div>
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Jocie made this dice. It was a little wooden box. She painted it white and then I cut out the dots using the Cricket. We glued the dots on together to make it look like a dice. </div>
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This right here is my baby! Spencer set up the game Just Like It Is Here. He put all the pieces out and had a whole idea of how the games was being played. He wanted it to look like we had just been playing. I glued everything down. While I was doing that Randy made a frame to go around it. After he was done I spent the next hour or so gluing money, community chest, chance and property cards to it. It took so long, but the results were worth it. I love it! </div>
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This is a cheesy game I found. It's called HANGMAN. We made it where we can still change out the tiles to say different things. </div>
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I'm not sure how these two pictures fused together. This Operation game is just like the one I had when I was a kid. </div>
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Here's a blurry picture of Joey as he jumped in front of my iPad...on purpose. Why does he always think this is funny? : )</div>
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Here's the awesome Star Wars game that the boys donated to the cause. This game actually came with a VHS to play along with. </div>
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Above my sink I have the game Girl Talk. I had this game as a Pre-Teen. It's a truth or dare game. It's also tells your future. I kept asking Randy and the boys questions from the game. We were cracking up. Apparently Randy will be meeting the Boy of his Dreams any day now. </div>
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This is a cute game called Head of the Class. Randy cut out part of the box and I glued it to the board. </div>
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This Peanut Butter and Jelly game is one of our favorites in the kitchen. It came out so dang cute!</div>
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I really like how Randy mounted this game partially on the ceiling. </div>
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I took this shadow box and filled it with all kinds of trivia cards. This was the last thing we added to the kitchen. It's right next to the UNGAME! Have you ever heard of this game? Dr. Dobson promotes this game. It's a "Game of Feelings." Our kids Love to Hate this game. </div>
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I like these boards Randy put on the divider wall. He had to cut them down a little bit to make them fit. </div>
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This Pin the Tail on the Donkey was something that Spencer found. We bought it for 10 cents! The box is really cool. It's called Donkey Party.
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One more last look at the kitchen from the door way. </div>
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<b>Fun Fun Fun! </b></div>
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<b>I love it! </b></div>
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<b>It Makes Me Happy. </b></div>
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Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-81588565487537314392011-09-03T22:12:00.002-05:002011-09-03T22:14:31.696-05:00Oh Yeah...I Made This<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<b>Look What I Made Today!!!</b></div>
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We are decorating our kitchen in vintage board games. (Pictures to follow as soon as we get the project done.) I saw this idea on Pinterest. I think it came out so cute.Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25818332.post-49370683561557126812011-09-01T12:59:00.001-05:002011-09-01T12:59:38.722-05:00Cemetary<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">I went to the cemetery again today. When I'm driving there I'm always asking myself why I'm going. Honestly, I feel Miles closer when I'm at the house than I do at the cemetery. But sometimes, the ache inside me is so deep that I have to go physically be near at least a part of him. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Today I took a water bottle and a rag so I could clean his headstone because last time I was there it looked dusty. (I also cleaned the headstone above his which is Randy's Dads, but it's much older and didn't come as clean.) </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">What do I do when I go to Miles's grave?</span><br />
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<ul>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Cry</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Sometimes I lie down next to him and pretend we're at home together. </span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Get stickers in my pants</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Pray and ask God to please help me through this</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Feel thankful that he wasn't buried in Babyland. I don't know why this matters to me, but it does.</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">I like to bring some kind of trinket</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Sweat and get bit by ants</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Try to picture Miles in Heaven instead of in the earth</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Tell Miles that I love him</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Think about how bad it sucks that he died</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Feel empty</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Usually get a headache</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Look at a painting of Jesus praying in the Garden of Gethsemane</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Feel guilty for not coming more often and ridiculous for coming at all</span></li>
</ul>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Why am I sharing this? Because it's part of it.<br /></span>Brandi Wilsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06092147055922181715noreply@blogger.com5