Need a laugh?

My Grandma gave the boys a book today that has been cracking me up. I thought I would share a few funny bits with you. The book is called "Kids Sure Rite Funny" by Art Linkletter. These quotes have been taken from kid's school papers and exams. I hope you get a kick out of them. (all the spelling is the way the kids's spelled on their papers)

Here is a queer-type bird. A oscridge that does not fly but runs like a horse. Except he uses two legs which makes him a queer-type horse, too.

(Describe DEMOSTHENES.)
I have never seen any of these.

one of my favorites....By titling his poem "Leaves of Grass" Walt Witman let us know it is poetry that is coming. If the title says something impossible we can know it is poetry and get ready for it. AMEN

I am not sure who wrote The Devil's Disciple, but this afternoon I will be where I can find out.

I think the greatest need in books today is one to briefly review all of man's knowledge up to now so we can get on with learning new things.

Tides are interesting if you happen to be interested in them.

Pigs like to be clean. They try to do it by rolling in the mud, not being as smart as we are.

The difference between bones and skeletons are the same except we live ones have bones while the dead ones have skeletons.

DEPORT is to export without wanting to go. (That was for my friend erica)

X's are becoming close to extinct, being used mainly just for signing and kissing.

Although I am rather weak in biology, I am the best they is in English class.

I plan to be married one day. Longer than one day really. It is just that this is how it is usually said.

(My favorite)
I have resolved this year not to fight my sister unless she fights me first or makes me mad or I feel like it.