Alley Cats

Monday night at about 9:00 Randy was being a great husband by taking out the trash…without even being asked. He went out through the boy’s bedroom to the back yard and threw one bag away. A few minutes later he popped his head through the door and asked me to bring him the other bag of trash. His shoes were muddy so he didn’t want to come into the house.
When I took the trash bag to him he told me to come outside because there were four bums outside in the alley and one was playing a guitar. I stuck my head outside and sure enough there was really loud guitar music coming from beside our trash cans. We have a privacy fence so I couldn’t see anyone, but it was so loud I thought the lead singer could possibly have a mic some how. He didn’t. He was such passionate.
I crack up at the singer, just one of the joys of living three blocks away from the Salvation Army. Randy got a huge grin on his face and said, “I think I’m gonna join them!” I laughed, but Joey didn’t. He showed definite concern about this situation and voiced his disapproval. I said, “What, are you going to tip the guy or something?” Randy said, “Yeah, go get me a dollar.” I’m cracking up at my obviously entertainment deprived husband and went to get him a dollar. When I gave him a dollar he said, “Hey, and get me a beer from the fridge.” Joey just shook his head and washed his hands of his Dad’s behavior. I took Randy the beer, looked directly into his eyes and said, “Bring Back Details!!!!”

About 15 minutes later I saw him come in with a limp. I yelled, “What did they do to you?” He grinned real big and told me that he just had muddy flip flops.

He told me that if I wanted details that I needed to get something to write with. I grabbed my laptop and we sat at the kitchen and laughed so hard that we had to gasp for air.

Details:
So, at about 9:00 at night there were four homeless guys hanging out in our alley and one had a guitar and was playing it loudly and putting on a show. Each of the four men had their tall can of beer inside a tall brown paper sack. Randy went out there to join them when one of them said, “Hey, we’re just out here havin’ some fun. You ain’t gonna call the Laws?”

Randy assured them that he wasn’t going to “call the Laws.” He said, “My wife told me that if I was going to come join you that I had to bring a tip.” That’s when he gave the dollar to the singer. The guy threw it in his guitar case.
The singer’s name is C.R. Perdy. He is about 60 years old and has a small frame. It was easy for Randy to remember his name because he kept inserting it in all the songs he played. He began to sing a song he said he wrote himself about Johnny Cash called “The Man in Black is Dead.”
When Spencer heard this he kept repeating, “The man in black is dead. The man in black is dead.” Joey, who is above such nonsense said, “Stop saying that. It’s not appropriate.” That kid cracks me up with how serious he can be sometimes.
After that song C.R. said, “Do you want to hear some Jimmy Buffet?”
C.R. began to sing “Margaritaville” and all the guys got excited until they realized that ol’ C.R. was going to be making up the words as he went along. Randy said that for some reason C.R. kept replacing the words “Margaritaville” for “Austin Texas” or “Daytona Beach Florida.” Also during Margaritaville he kept going on a tangent about bikers and a woman with long black hair.
Randy said that C.R. had his guitar strap attached with a strap, and every once in awhile he would stop singing, sling his guitar to his back, say something, and then sling his guitar back to the front to continue singing. One such time he looked at Randy and said, “I don’t know your name.” Randy told him his name. Then C.R. said with a song, “Oh, Randy, like…On The Other Hand.” One of the other guys said, “Yeah, like Randy Travis.” Then the other guy said, “Hey, do you know any Randy Travis?” C.R. just shook his head and said, “No, I can’t know em’ all.”
Twice during this jam session two of the guys stepped about five feet away to pee in our alley. Nice.
The guys kept wanting to hear the blues. C.R. didn’t know the blues I guess. There was one guy there from Philadelphia. Randy said he was tall and stocky. Every once in awhile the big guy would get tickled during a song and he would punch Randy in the arm…Rather Forcefully Randy added. He said he was kind of scared of the big guy even though he looked happy.
One time the big guy started laughing and C.R. swung his guitar around and asked what they were laughing at. The big guy just said, “We’re not laughing at you. We’ve just got our own thing going on over here.”
Before Randy left he was reminded that Willie Nelson was going to be in town the next night. And, wouldn’t you know it…our very own Alley Performer was going to open for him. That’s what was told to Randy anyway. Can you believe that Randy had a Back Alley Pass to see the opening act for Willey Nelson?
Well, after all those details and laughing so hard I was crying I realized that it was 9:24 and the kids were still up. I couldn’t believe how late it was already.
Randy said, “Time really flies when your Jammin’ with Transients!”