Tuesday, November 24, 2009

MY Top 10

Today I was walking around Target with Miles and I found something I could have spent a fortune on! I came upon the Christmas Movie Section. I love Christmas Movies!!! I also LOVE Christmas music. Randy doesn't like either one of those! Anyway, I didn't buy anything. I just decided to share my Top 10 with you.

MY #1. I love this movie! National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. My favorite part of this movie is...well, ALL of it! Clark makes me laugh at everything he does!!!

MY #2. A Christmas Story. My favorite part is when Ralphie freezes up when he sees Santa but then stops himself from going down the slide to tell Santa that he wants a Red Rider BeBe gun then Santa tells him that he would shoot his eye out. I crack up every time Santa pushes him down the slide with his boot.

MY #3. ELF. I've watched this movie so many times. It just doesn't get old. It doesn't have to be Christmas time to watch this movie! There's too many favorite parts to list on this movie, but I like the "Something Special" he gives to his Dad.

MY #4. How the Grinch Stole Christmas. This movie reminds me of my Grandma Jody. I remember watching it on TV while I laid on her living room floor. I never wanted it to end. Also, I remember that when the Grinch's heart was too small I thought that must be what my Grandpa's problem was. hehehe

MY #5. Rudolph. Again, this reminds me of my Grandma Jody. She loved this movie, and she loved to buy us the figurines from this movie. Even the last couple of years she bought my brother and I things from the movie. As a kid I was scared of Bumbles. I was glad he got his tooth fixed.

MY #6. Mickey's Once Upon A Christmas. Yep, you guessed it. It reminds me of my Grandma Jody. Plus I love old Mickey Mouse stuff. It reminds me of being a kid. I still rent Mickey Mouse & Donald Duck at the library to watch with and without the kids. It just makes me happy.

MY #7. The Santa Clause 2. Okay, this is MY list and I can like this movie if I want to. 2 years ago the kids were sick and they had to stay home from school. It wasn't anywhere near Christmas time, but I went to Hollywood video and had the crazy idea of renting a bunch of Christmas movies for them to watch. We laid around all day cracking up over Christmas movies. This one was our favorite of the day and so it became special to me.

MY #8. A Charlie Brown Christmas. Yes, it reminds me of my Grandma. Plus, how can you talk about Christmas movies and not bring it up? It's a classic for anyone my age. I loved the Christmas tree he picked out. It was sweet.

MY #9. Frosty the Snowman. Classic. I remember thinking the same thing would happen to me when I made a snowman. Of course it's hard to make a real snowman in West Texas, but I remember not being disappointed that the snowman didn't come to life. I felt like it was alive it just couldn't talk to me. Anyway, it's a cute show.

MY #10 It's a Wonderful Life. I haven't seen it in so long, but I loved it even as a kid.

HONORABLE MENTION: Fred Clause. It only came out last year so it hasn't made my Top 10 yet, but as a family we really liked it. I personally think Vince Vaughn is SOOOO funny, but I don't like to watch many things he's in so it was nice to get to watch him in a kids movie. Funny Stuff.

So, there you have it. What's your favorite Christmas movie? Is there something I forgot? Are you having a hard time believing that my list would have The Santa Clause 2 movie before It's a Wonderful Life? Are you a Christmas movie hater like Randy? Let me know what you think.

Monday, November 16, 2009

With God All Things Are Possible...Even Joy.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

An ongoing trial has come to my life. For the last five years I have taken care of my son who has cerebral palsy, dystonia, cortical vision impairment, chronic hypothermia and brain damage. For a long time to consider my trial pure joy seemed unattainable. Yet, as my faith has continued to be tested I’ve felt the stretching and growth of perseverance developing in me.
There have been many times in the last five years that I would have traded “maturity, completeness & without lack” in a heartbeat. I’ve cried out to God several times for me to be able to see my son healed even if it meant that I didn’t finish the race I’ve been given to run. In the past I’ve been willing to give up my birth right for a bowl of soup. I’ve believed the lie that if Miles were healed that everything else in my life would be simpler and without heartache.
I’m not sure when it happened, but those are not things I feel anymore. At this time in my life I would not trade Miles’ healing for Perseverance’s lasting work. I would not want Miles’ healing out of God’s will and timing. I now refuse to give up my birth right for today’s fleeting pleasure. I now am sober to the fact that with this life comes trials and tribulations even when we’re right in the middle of God’s will.
Today I will not wrestle with God about the Why’s and the When’s. Instead when I take care of Miles I will consider it pure joy that my perseverance is well on it’s way to being made mature, complete and lacking in nothing.
Today, and for as long as it takes I will live in this tension where my son has brain damage and yet my God is a healer. I will consider this trial a joy. I will work as unto the Lord. I will continue to love Miles in a manor that honors God. As I go about the medical routine I will worship God by serving Miles. I will guard my heart from hopelessness. I will believe the best for Miles and continue to trust God with the desires of my heart.
Joy is not unattainable.

Sunday, November 01, 2009

Hope. Process. Sum

I just left church.

Pastor Jimmy talked about Hope, The Process and the Sum at the End.

I feel like the hardened scab on my heart has been picked at.

He was talking about things we go through and how we focus on the Sum or the outcome that we’re wanting, but how there’s a process to everything. Also, he of course talked about how a hope deferred makes the heart sick. Basically, he was reading my mail.

He stirred up emotions in me that I haven’t felt in a while. He was talking about Hope in a different way than our culture views it. Today the word Hope is more like the word Wish. I Hope for something/I Wish for something. He was saying that the word Hope in the Bible is the stuff Faith is made out of it. It’s more like Expect.

He talked about how sometimes when our Hope/Expect is delayed over a long period of time that it can feel frustrating. Yeah, I agree.

He told a personal story of how him and his wife had been married for a long time when they decided that they wanted to have a child of their own. His wife couldn’t have babies anymore so they began praying for a way to adopt a baby. He started ticking off the years: 1 year, 2 years, 3 years, 4 years and nothing. No baby. He even began working in a place with fosters kids and adoptions going on around him and still no baby. 5 years and no baby.

As he started ticking off the years I felt my heart breaking. The foundations of my “doing okay walls” began to shake in it’s weak foundation. I had a desire to scream out that I knew what he was talking about.

Year six came around for him and he spoke about being able to be in the room when his daughter that he was going to adopt was being born. It was so beautiful. They had waited six years for her and today she turned 9 years old.

Hope. Process. Sum.

Today was the first day of the series he’s starting about Exodus and the “process.” I think he said it’s the first of the next five weeks. I guess I have a choice of holding my hand over the wound of my heart and just go through the motions of church for the next five weeks or I can allow Hope to be restored again in the area of Miles’ healing.