Friday, September 29, 2006

I would like to CAST you into the sea!

Here's something the doctors didn't tell us...

Right now Randy is in the other room with Miles cutting part of his cast off. When we came back from Ft. Worth on Tuesday we realized that the cast was a little too snug. It's been a lot harder to change his diaper with this new cast. It's so close to his bottom that Randy's fingers are a little too big to tuck Miles diaper in correctly. It's even hard for me. There's just no room in there.

Well, every time I picked Miles up today he started to cry. This never happens! I could tell he was hurting. This evening we had plans to eat dinner with our nephew and niece at Texas Roadhouse. When we got Miles ready we saw that he had a sore on his bottom where his tail bone has been rubbing on the cast. It looked sore but we couldn't do anything at the time. We went to the RH and Miles was so cranky. He just kept crying and crying. Randy and I took turns the entire time standing outside with him. Let me tell you...Cast Boy is heavy! My back is hurting so bad right now!

On the way home we called a friend and asked him if he had any tin snips. He did so we picked them up and Randy just did surgery on the cast! He cut a big portion off his back and now he's putting fresh waterproof tape all around. When he cut the cast we were able to tell how bad the sore was. If we had waited another day Miles could have been in some serious pain! I feel terrible about it. I'm so glad that Randy was able to fix it! I wouldn't have let anyone else near Miles with that tool! Man, I'm glad Randy has skills!

Furniture...of all kinds.

It's been a while since my last post and for good reason. Monday Miles' wheelchair arrived at my house. I was totally shocked. I truly believed that Miles was going to be totally restored by the time the wheelchair got to my house. I really don't know what to say about that except my heart was broken. I was totally shocked! So was Randy. We just didn't know what we should say, think or feel about the whole thing. With everything in us we believed that Miles was going to be running around our house when the wheelchair man came to drop it off. When we got a call from the medical supply company and they told us that it had came in and they were dropping it off in 20 minutes we still believed. Randy was jumping around the house and as excited as could be. We still thought it was going to happen. The nurse was here and we thought she was about to get the show of her life!
When the medical supply guy drove up to our house and started to wheel that chair into my house my heart sank. Randy and I both totally went into auto pilot. The man explained everything about the chair and how to take it apart. He went over instructions. He was as excited as could be because he designed every detail of the chair for Miles. Randy and I were not rude but we were not jumping for joy like the man probably wished we were. The man was really disappointed because he couldn't adjust Miles to the chair yet since he is still casted. Well, before the man left he brought me a big stack of papers to sign. Every time I signed my name my heart broke more and my hope decreased that I would ever see my son do more than he does right now. By the time I signed everything I was totally numb. My head was spinning with questions and it pounded with pain.
When the man left, Randy and I sat on the couch and held Miles. Randy said that we should just try to process everything instead of talk. I went and laid down on my bed and I checked out of the world. I slept so hard for hours. When I woke up my heart was so heavy I could hardly get out of bed. We had to leave for Ft. Worth that day for Miles' cast change the next day. I kept trying to pack but every time I got up I found myself sitting on the bed just staring off into space. I couldn't seem to do anything.
While we were waiting for the man to drop off the chair I called Francesca and Rachel to tell them that it was on it's way. After my nap I called them to tell them that I was wrong about hearing God and it was two of the most painful phone calls I've ever made. My heart just felt ripped out. I felt inconsolable.
Over the next few days I got several phone calls, letters, visits and emails from friends telling me that they were sorry and tried to comfort me. I'm so thankful for not going through this alone. Without the people around me that love me and my family so dearly I think by now I would be bitter and I would have a hardened heart about Miles' healing. All my friends have been so compassionate. They don't make me feel like I'm not doing enough or brave enough or that I don't have enough faith. They are all so warm and caring to me. They all seem to have taken on this burden and want to help carry it. I don't know if any family is loved more than ours.
Over those days I was a wreck. I felt like I was in a cloud. I kept getting mad that everything around me kept going on and that I had to be a part of that! I had so many extra things going on this week and it didn't allow me to sit around and be upset like I wanted to. I know now that was a major blessing, and I knew it at the time but I didn't want to admit that! On Wednesday mornings my friends Rachel and Krissy come over for coffee. All the way home on Tuesday night from Ft. Worth I kept telling Randy that I wanted to cancel coffee but he wouldn't let me. I told him that I would let them come over but I wasn't going to like it and I wasn't going to act like I liked it! I later found out that it wouldn't have helped if I cancelled anyway! They had both already decided that they were going to come to coffee if I said they could or not. I just love that. Real friends will come over if you want them to or not.
I remember when all this first happened with Miles and we were at the hospital. I thought I didn't want to see anyone and all my friends wanted to come, but I told them not to. Pam called me and left me a message that said she was coming because we needed them. My friends did come and it ended up being one of my most treasured memories of all time. We sat outside with coffee and laughed and laughed at Pastor Brandon. He was doing some of the most outrageous things and I couldn't get enough of it.
Anyway, I enjoyed coffee with Rachel and Krissy. We actually didn't have any coffee Wednesday. I think I was being rebellious and I didn't make any. Krissy said, "That's okay. We don't really come here for the coffee."
So, before I tell you the good news. I will say that I was a mess. My heart really felt like it was broken and trying to harden. I was trying to decide if it was worth the pain to continue to HOPE for Miles to ever be healed. I thought I heard God so clearly and to find out that I didn't hear him really shook me. It made me question a million things. What's the point of praying if God's just going to do what he's going to do? How can we be life group leaders if our own son is a constant reminder that God hasn't done what we all think he should do? How can I serve people when I feel like dying myself? Basically it was every WHY and HOW question that I can think of and a few terrible questions that I don't even want to disclose.

The wheelchair is in our living room and no one wants to even look at it. No one will comment about it. Randy and I sit in our living room and we won't turn our bodies towards the thing. We haven't watched TV since Monday when we got it. I think it's because the wheelchair is right beside the TV and we just don't desire to have anything to do with it. You know, this is a $6,700 piece of equipment and we're acting like it's toxic waste! You may be asking...What's so bad about a wheelchair. Maybe you're not asking. Maybe you know, but in case you don't...It's the whole idea of it and what it stands for. It's saying, "My son should be doing things that he's not doing!" It's seems more permanent. It feels like once you go there that's where you stay. Anyway, it's upsetting. No one wants their child to have a wheelchair.

So, that was all the yucky stuff.

Yesterday morning I woke up and I was still in bed and I said, "God, I need to feel you close to me today. I know you are here but I need to feel you." Soon after that I got a call from Brenda. (An Elder from our church.) She told me that the church wanted to buy our bedroom furniture that we had picked out!!!! Before we moved into our new home Randy and I picked out some bedroom furniture that is absolutely beautiful! It really appeals to my Princess heart! When we saw it the first time we both knew it was just what we wanted. At the time we really felt like Kathy Hawk (Another Elder from our church) was going to buy it for us. That was seven months ago. Randy even talked to Kathy one time to tell her that we thought she was going to buy our furniture for us. Well, we never heard anything from her and we honestly gave up hope on that idea very recently. We thought, "Well, I guess we were wrong and we will just made due with what we have."
When Brenda called and told me that the church was buying our beautiful furniture I was screaming happy! What was really neat was that them giving us furniture wasn't just some pitty gift to make us distracted from the wheelchair arrival. Brenda told me, "We want this furniture to be a reminder to keep your heart soft." When she said that I just felt my heart melt. I really felt a release from the heaviness that I had been carrying for several days. I couldn't get the cheesy grin off my face! I called a ton of people to tell them my wonderful news! I went right over to the furniture store to make sure they still had what I wanted. I ended up going to that store three times yesterday! I wasn't embarrassed at all! The first time it was just Melody and I that went. The next time it was Randy, Me, Melody and Miles. The third time it was Randy, Me, Jim, Brenda, Joey, Spencer, Jocie, Melody and Miles! The lady that had been helping me all day asked me, 'Who are all these extra kids?" Mine of course!
Anyway, they bought our stuff last night! They bought us a bed. It's a huge, four post gorgeous bed that I will probably have the rest of my life! We also got a dresser with a mirror. The dresser is tall and has slate squares on top. Some of the drawers are lined with black velvet!!! We also got a night stand. It's so big that I only wanted one of them. It also has the lined drawer and the slate tiles. We also got the bedding that was on the bed. (New ones of course) It's so beautiful! I wouldn't be able to find anything I liked better! Normally you might not think the bedding is me, but it is the bedroom me. :) AND!!!! We also got the most beautiful armoire ever! It's so beautiful! I love it so much! It's such a treasure! It just looks rich!
When I first went to the store yesterday the saleslady was saying that it could take 2 to 4 to 6 weeks to get all the pieces of furniture in. She said that she has four other stores and that she would call to see if they had any of the pieces. If they didn't then she would have to order if from Ashley and it could take 6 weeks. Well, at lunch I was telling Jim and Brenda this and Jim said, "No, it's going to be at her other stores in the name of Jesus!". When I went the second time to the store she said that her other store did have the other pieces and that a guy from there was already coming to Abilene the next day and that he would bring my stuff!!!! The lady told me that she could have it delivered and set up in my house on MONDAY! When I saw Jim next and told him the news he gave me a big High Five! It was cute.
So the whole day was s huge rush! It was so fun planning, and deciding and picking out and calling everyone about my furniture! But it was more than that...

It did something more than just meet a furniture desire. I sent an IM to Brenda last night thanking her for being a part of our special day. I told her that the timing of the furniture was perfect. We had picked it out about 7 months ago, but getting it yesterday was so much better than getting it the day we found it. It was perfect timing and getting it did more than I could have thought possible. It brought hope back to Randy and I. As I was writing the message I thought about Miles. I thought about the restoration of Miles body. When it happens the timing will be perfect. I will be glad it didn't happen by the time the wheelchair came. Also, I know that Miles' healing will do more than I can even imagine.

How did getting furniture yesterday restore Hope? Who knows? I do know that without Hope I have nothing. With Faith I have salvation and that means that my eternal life will be forever with my Maker. Hope is the thing that is needed here on earth until eternity. A few days ago I was thinking that it was going to be too painful to keep Hope alive. I thought that is was too disappointing, but again, I realize that Hope is what makes this life with Jesus exciting.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Randy & His Candy

Well, it's taken 10 years of marriage, but the honeymoon is over. We went to the movies on our anniversary date, and Randy brought along some Now-n-Laters candy to snack on. Well, when we found our seat he put his candy under his bottom "so they can get warm" he explained. I told him that was not first date material.

As if that wasn't enough when he got up to go get a soda he tossed the candy to me to have me sit on them while he was gone.

I did.

I told him that I wasn't going to admit sitting on his candy, but I Did.

Monday, September 11, 2006


Oh my goodness Miles stinks! He has a sponge bath every day but it doesn't help on the odor! Starting last Wednesday which was 3 weeks and one day after he had his cast put on he started smelling. The smell is definitly a sweat and urine mixture. It's so yucky and over powering! Yesterday at church Randy asked me if I thought Miles had a dirty diaper. I leaned over to smell him and I said, "No, it's his cast." Well, I thought for a minute and decided there was no way just his cast could be that stinky so Randy took him out of the service to see if he had a dirty diaper. He quickly returned and it was just his cast that smelled. I held him all during church and I left there so nauseated! Last night I was holding him and my stomach hurt from the smell!

I've been telling people that he stinks and here's the suggestions that I've received. Someone said that I should sprinkle baking soda down the cast to absorb the odor. That wouldn't work because the powder gets cakey. Then someone said FaBreeze. I thought that might work, but I didn't want to spray it on his skin. I thought it might irritate it. Then, someone said, "Why don't you spray him with feminine spray?" You know Summer's Eve stuff? Randy said, "Well, it is for sensitive skin!". :) So, last night we all went to Wal-Mart and shopped for feminine spray. We didn't have anything else to buy there so all seven of us were staring at the feminine product incap. Randy couldn't take it so he sent all the kids to look at the Band-Aids while we figured out what in the world to buy.

I told Randy that I didn't want to get a scent that smells like a woman. He thought we should find a manly smell, but believe it or not that they don't sell manly feminine spray! They had scents like Tropical Rain Forrest, Baby Powder and something floral. Randy sprayed the floral and I had to put my foot down! I did not want my son smelling like a panty liner! Then we found a scent that was called "SUPER ULTRA". We laughed so hard! That was the smell! SUPER ULTRA! We thought about the woman that would buy such a product! It had to be a serious problem if only the scent SUPER ULTRA would work. We smelled SUPER ULTRA then sprayed some on his cast. We decided this was the scent for us! It actually worked!

So we went through the self check out. I was not about to go through a line with five children at 8:30 on a Sunday night only buying SUPER ULTRA feminine spray! As we were walking to our car we saw two college age friends of ours going inside. Both Boys. Randy went to go chase them down and before he went through the door he threw the bag of spray at me. I picked it up and the whole time we were talking to the guys I was hiding the spray behind my back! I didn't want to get into the reasons we were buying SUPER ULTRA feminine spray.

When we got home Randy was changing Miles and Spencer went over to take a big whiff of Miles cast. He started making gagging noises and yelling about how bad Miles smelled. After Randy sprayed Miles all over I told Spencer to go smell him again. "Much Better" he said. It really does work!

This morning before I went into the grocery store the nurse Christy called me to ask me a couple of things. While I had her on the phone I told her why that feminine spray was in there and she said, "I figured that's why it was in here. I wasn't going to ask".

So, if you have SUPER ULTRA odor problems of any kind...Summer's Eve feminine spray for $2.86 will do you nicely.

Friday, September 08, 2006

September 2, 2006

Cast Boy & The Girls


I should have blogged this yesterday to get to full emotion in it, but by now the Lord has settled me. The reason I'm still writing about what happened to me yesterday is because I think a whole chapter of my book in the making will be about situations like this one.

So, yesterday the nurse Christy and I decided that we needed to take Miles to see the pediatrician because he's been acting strange. He hasn't been running a fever but you can tell he doesn't feel well. We weren't sure if he was sick or if he was having hip trouble or not. Now, Christy could have taken Miles by herself, but I'm still adjusting to her taking care of him much less her taking him to the doctor without me! All my other kids were in other places all over town so I decided to go with her. (Joey and Spencer were at school, Jocie was at Mother's Day Out, and Melody was at the library with her Grandma) So, I'm running the kids all over town to drop them off, and I had to stop and get Miles' medicaid card. Since I've moved his card does not come to our house so when he has an appointment (which is always) I have to go to the Medicaid office to pick up his card for the month. I've put in address changes at that office but it hasn't worked. They finally told me that I have to go to another office to change the address because he is a special needs child. Oh, and I've tried to be on top of things by going up there at the beginning of the month so I will have his card before I need it, but that's against the rules. You can only get a temp. aard on the day of the appt. (I know most of that was probably of no interest to you, but you have to keep that book in mind.) So, you can see by 9:00 I've already done a day's worth of thinking.
As I'm about to go in to get the card I realized that I'm about to go to the pediatrician's office. Insight: For me one of the hardest places to go is the pediatrician's office. It's filled with normal kids and bored parents. I just don't like going there at all anymore. I called a friend to pray for me so I would not get depressed after leaving there. I explained to Christy (nurse) why going there is hard for me. First of all, having Miles at the house and around my friends and stuff is different because he's just adorable and lovable Miles. I don't have to explain anything. I don't have to wonder what they're thinking. At the office either people don't talk to me at all or people talk to me too much and both are terrible. Christy told me that I shouldn't let it bother me. I gave her the look like...easier said than done. She soon saw my point.

Okay, so we go to Dr. Wiley's office and we're in the waiting room. People are all around us and No One speaks to us. I'm there, and Christy is there in her scrubs holding Miles in his big ol' cast and no one talks to us. They stare a little, but no words. It wasn't too bad. I was fine with it. The whole appointment went well. I was feeling good. I didn't feel sad at all. I actually had a great time with Christy. We're becoming quick friends. Well, Dr. Wiley ordered X-rays for Miles so we could make sure his hip was still in place. Miles did have an ear infection so we were all pretty sure that was his problem, but we all agreed that x-rays would make us feel better. (By the way his hip is still in place. I didn't want to make you have to wait on that info.)

So, we leave the office to get x-rays. The x-ray place is in the same building but another office. We walked in the x-ray office and it was packed! I've been in there before and it has always been super quick but not yesterday! I actually had to stand because there were no more chairs. Christy was holding Miles so I let her sit in the open chair. I signed in and all that. Well, like I said the place was packed. There was a girl there in a wheelchair/bed in the office with her Mom and her nurse. The girl was 15. She couldn't do anything at all. She was covered in blankets and was totally handicapped. Well, her Mom looked at Miles and it was like she knew the whole situation. A lot of people look at Miles and think he's sleepy. This drives Randy and I absolutely crazy! I'm telling you...The wrong person is going to say something about Miles being sleepy one day and they are going to get an ear full from Randy or I. It's not going to be pretty. I'm already feeling sorry for that person! Miles is not sleepy...That's his personality or lack of. Anyway, this lady knew he was not sleepy.

Before I go on...I want you to understand this lady's heart. She was full of compassion. She wanted to help me. I know she did. Her motives are not questioned here. I just want you to have a good picture of her. She's been doing what I've been doing for 15 years and she wanted to help me and be a comfort to me. She was not any of these things to me but she wanted to be.

As soon as she saw me she began to ask me questions about Miles. She seemed to know what his deal was already, but she just kept asking me questions. Let me remind you that the room was packed. These people were bored so they were all listening to our conversation. I didn't really want to answer all her questions so I would answer her and then turn my body towards Christy in the opposite direction to talk to her. Well, that lady would just ask something else about Miles or ask me if I knew about this program or that program for Miles. It went on and on. She asked me when I started using nurse care. I told her that it was just a week ago. She told me how she waited so long because she thought she could do it all herself, but it got too hard. Now, I had not told her that I knew Miles was going to be healed. I had just told her medical things.

So here's the picture...She now knows all the info about Miles. She knows that I have help from a nurse and then the whole thing changed. The room is still full. She turns to me so seriously and says, "I know how you feel. I know exactly how you feel. I was in denial for a long time about my daughter. For 11 years I thought she was going to be fine. I thought she was going to walk and do things. I would see it in my dreams and she was fine. So, I know how you feel."

I was shocked! I felt so laid bare in front of all those people. My body physically felt like I had been thrown up against a wall by her words. I said in a quiet voice, "I'm not ready for that" and I started crying right there in the waiting room. I was so embarrassed and upset that I was crying in front of all those people. Her words were too much! She said that it was okay that I wasn't ready to accept it. She said that it took her 11 years. Then, she came over and hugged me. This was as bad as me crying! Oh, my goodness I wanted to crawl in a hole! This kind of behavior is totally unacceptable behavior for me! I was so stunned by it all. I felt like I was on display in front of all these people with my secret fear laid out in the middle of the room. It was horrible!

I turned to Christy and said, "Do you see what I mean about people talking too little or people talking too much?" She did understand.

So, after the appointment I called my friend to tell her just how the appointment went. I asked her, "What am I supposed to do with this? In one realm believing totally that Miles is going to be healed is called faith. In another realm is called denial!" WHICH IS IT? Is it easier to believe that Miles is going to be healed than it is to believe that he isn't? Is it easier to have hope or to be hopeless. I picked the right friend to call yesterday because she is full of truth. She explained to me that the Lord has told me that Miles is going to be healed. She reminded me of Numbers 23:19 "God is not a man, that he should lie. He is not a human, that he should change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through?" From that scripture most of you can tell that my friend was Francesca. She was saying that she didn't know that lady's situation or belief, but she knew mine. God has not told me that this is the way Miles is going to be. If he had told me that for some reason then I could accept it, but he has not said that to me. God has only told me that he will heal Miles so I'm not in denial.

It's amazing what truth will do! It really does bring freedom! That lady's words tried to attach to me and make me think that I was in denial, but it didn't work. God has told me that Miles will be healed. God is not a man that he would lie. He's not a human that he would change his mind. I cannot think of a time when he has spoken and failed to act. I can't think of a time he has promised and not carried it through. God is who he says he is and he will do what he says he will do.

So, I'm better now. I do have to tell you the other hilarious part of the waiting room! It saved me! It did make me look emotionally unstable, but it was worth it. There was this young mom in there with her daughter who is 2. The grandma was also with them. The little girl had a hurt foot that had to be x-rayed. This Mom was so loud and talked nonstop. She was the only thing that took attention off of my drama which I'm so thankful for. She was outrageous with the things she would talk about! She was shameless with her dysfunction! Everyone was cracking up in the waiting room when she would say outrageous things. I have inherited the inability to control myself from laughing in bad situations. I got this from my Mom. If I find something funny I have to laugh at all cost. If I try to stop it makes it much worse! This was one of those situations! This lady was so loud! She was on the phone a lot of time talking to her Dad I think. She was saying something about her boyfriend was out doing community service (funny), he had already been to Skinny's to fill out an application (funnier), but they don't hire felons (hilarious!). I laughed so hard at this conversation. The older lady next to me was more composed than I, but she was indeed tickled! Christy was laughing as well. Now, I think under normal circumstances she would have been able to control herself, but with me laughing so hard so was also laughing hard. The receptionist even told us that we were having way too much fun. She knew exactly why we were laughing and that made it all funnier. Then the lady started talking about how she just got a NEW probation officer. She explained how they keep trading her off. This was too much! I was laughing shamelessly. Of course I was laughing at her! There was nothing else going on! She could have accused me of laughing at her and I would have to admit openly that I was indeed laughing at her. I would have got away with it to because one minute before that I was crying in front of the whole room. Plus we had just had the whole yucky hug episode. I'm not sure that the Lord himself didn't put that girl in the room just to help me out of the spotlight a bit. Anyway, it was funny! As soon as Christy and I got to the other room we laughed so hard about how everything had played out. We couldn't believe our morning already.


Tuesday, September 05, 2006

I'm going to see Jesus walk on the water.

I was doing my WOW homework while sitting at Subway and I received some wonderful revelation!!!

We were to read Matthew 14:22-33. It's about when Jesus walks on the water. Of course I've read the story before but today there was more insight into the situation. After reading the passage the question in the homework was, "Did the wind die down before or after Christ told his disciples not to be afraid?" The answer is After. Then it asked, "What would be the basis of their courage since the storm continued to rage?"

I really had to think about this. The basis of their courage was the fact that Jesus was God so they should have been comforted that He was going to take care of them.

This is what Beth Moore said about this situation:
The point is not that we have nothing to fear and that cowardice is simply an unreasonable state of mind. His presence is the basis for courage in our storms. Christ did not say, "Take courage! I am calming the storm. Don't be afraid." Instead, with the winds still raging, He said, "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid." He does not always immediately calm the storm, but He is always willing to calm His child on the basis of His presence. "Don't worry! I'm right here! I know the winds are raging and the winds are high, but I am God over both. If I let them continue to swell, it's only because I want you to see me walk on the water. This set of prints can be seen only in the storm. I'm in this with you, and I love you more than you'll ever know." We'll probably never learn to enjoy our storms, but we can learn to enjoy God's presence in the storm!

Oh my goodness this is good! This is just what I was talking about with the whole bean spout and Oak of Righteousness thing! Jesus could have just stopped the storm like he had before, but the disciples would not have seen him walk on the water. Jesus could have already rescued me from all this with Miles then I would not have the privilege to see him walk on the water. It's so exciting! I loved the part where it talks about that Jesus knows the winds are raging and the waves are high, but if he continues to let them swell it's only because he wants me to see him walk on the water. What a life changing day that will be.

Verse 33 says, "Then the disciples worshiped him, "You really are the Son of God!" they exclaimed.

Friday, September 01, 2006

Bean Sprout Verses Oak of Righteousness

I’ve decided I would like to be an Oak of Righteousness instead of a bean. Lately I’ve been tired and I’ve been worn out from all the “growing” I’ve had to do. Next month my son Miles will turn two years old. This means that for almost everyday of the last two years I have been in the biggest trial of my life. On a recent Sunday after church I was laying in my bed talking to my husband about how long it’s been and how hard it’s been when I saw a picture in my head. I saw a window seal in a Kindergarten class room with rows of plastic cups filled with bean sprouts. When I saw that picture I instantly understood what I was seeing. You know, there’s a reason that Kindergarten teachers let their students grow bean sprouts. A bean will grow quickly. A normal Kindergartener’s attention span usually is that of a bean so it’s fitting. As I was thinking of this I felt like I had to make a choice if I wanted to sprout out of this trial and be a bean or did I want to continue with this trial and become an Oak of Righteousness. A bean is here today, eaten tomorrow and gone forever. An Oak tree lasts for generations. Later that evening I was doing my homework for Women of Worth and this is the verse I read. Isaiah 61:1-3. In verse 3 it says, “And provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor.” The Lord is about to do that for me. He is about to heal my son Miles from brain damage. He is giving me beauty for ashes, joy for my mourning, praise instead of despair. He is making me into an oak of righteousness for his own glory.
God wants to do the same for you. What is that thing or process in your life that you would like to give up and be a bean about? Don’t give up! Don’t be a bean! Decide that you want to stick with the Lord as he makes you into a strong and graceful oak of righteousness for his own glory! Take on the motto of our house, “It’s Gonna Be Worth It!”