I wrote this in November of 2006. I came across it today and it made me smile. It was published in our church monthly newsletter. (Man, they gave me some leeway on this one)
The Background on this story is important! Miles had pulled his hip out of socket. His muscles were so tight so when he had a growth spurt it pulled his hip right out. It was terrible! He had to have surgery. Then he was in a Spica Cast for 3 months so his hip could heal. The Spica Cast went from his chest to his toes with a bar that held his legs apart. There was a small hole left for diapering. Did I mention that he had it for 3 months??? Actually within the three months he ended up having 3 different casts. He turned 2 while he was in that cast. We had to carry him around in a pillow filled wagon. The whole process was horrible! Praise the Lord that even in the middle of horrible, God has given us a sense of humor! ENJOY!
Oh my goodness Miles stinks! He has a sponge bath every day but it doesn't help on the odor! Starting last Wednesday, which was 3 weeks and one day after he had his cast put on, he started smelling. The smell is definitely a sweat and urine mixture. It's so yucky and over powering! Yesterday at church Randy asked me if I thought Miles had a dirty diaper. I leaned over to smell him and I said, "No, it's his cast." Well, I thought for a minute and decided there was no way just his cast could be that stinky so Randy took him out of the service to see if he had a dirty diaper. He quickly returned and it was just his cast that smelled. I held him all during church and I left there so nauseated! Last night I was holding him and my stomach hurt from the smell!
I've been telling people that he stinks and here are the suggestions that I've received. Someone said that I should sprinkle baking soda down the cast to absorb the odor. That wouldn't work because the powder gets cakey. Then someone said Febreze. I thought that might work, but I didn't want to spray it on his skin. I thought it might irritate it. Then, someone said, "Why don't you spray him with feminine spray?" You know Summer's Eve stuff? Randy said, "Well, it is for sensitive skin!” :) So, last night we all went to Wal-Mart and shopped for feminine spray. We didn't have anything else to buy there so all seven of us were staring at the feminine product in-cap. Randy couldn't take it so he sent all the kids to look at the Band-Aids while we figured out what in the world to buy.
I told Randy that I didn't want to get a scent that smells like a woman. He thought we should find a manly smell, but believe it or not they don't sell manly feminine spray! They had scents like Tropical Rain Forrest, Baby Powder and something floral. Randy sprayed the floral and I had to put my foot down! I did not want my son smelling like a panty liner! Then we found a scent that was called "SUPER ULTRA". We laughed so hard! That was the smell! SUPER ULTRA! We thought about the woman that would buy such a product! It had to be a serious problem if only the scent SUPER ULTRA would work. We smelled SUPER ULTRA then sprayed some on his cast. We decided this was the scent for us! It actually worked!
So we went through the self check out. I was not about to go through a line with five children at 8:30 on a Sunday night only buying SUPER ULTRA feminine spray! As we were walking to our car we saw two college age friends of ours going inside. Both Boys. Randy went to go chase them down and before he went through the door he threw the bag of spray at me. I picked it up and the whole time we were talking to the guys I was hiding the spray behind my back! I didn't want to get into the reasons we were buying SUPER ULTRA feminine spray.
When we got home Randy was changing Miles and Spencer went over to take a big whiff of Miles cast. He started making gagging noises and yelling about how bad Miles smelled. After Randy sprayed Miles all over I told Spencer to go smell him again. "Much Better" he said. It really does work!
So, if you have SUPER ULTRA odor problems of any kind...Summer's Eve feminine spray for $2.86 will do you nicely.
You may be asking, “Why in the world is a story like this in a church newsletter, and what does it have to do with my walk with the Lord?” Well, if you think about it, how many times do we have sin that is “stinking” up our lives; but instead of letting the Lord clean us up – we try to mask the symptoms of our sin with other “sprays”?
Let’s say you have gotten into the habit of spending more money than you make. Do you repent (change your mind) and get help to put your finances in order, or do you “spray” over the problem by using credit cards to keep up the spending? Just like I was holding the spray behind my back so our young college friends wouldn’t know our problem, it’s the same as trying to cover up our sin so others won’t know what’s really going on in our lives. I could go on and on with examples like this one. The point is that instead of trying to cover up our stinky sin, let’s try to take those things to the Father with real repentance and let Him clean us up! Lord, please clean us up in a SUPER ULTRA WAY! We need you!