Saturday, November 15, 2008

Waiting Room Wit

I wrote this in my journal while being in a waiting room yesterday for at least an hour.

I think wine should be served in waiting rooms. There should be a one or two glass limit and children should be able to partake. It would be good for everyone. I wonder who I should bring this up to.

Right now there's a patient here that looks like he's a dwarf. His top half and head is large and his legs are small and maybe crooked. His face is so pale and it looks like he doesn't get enough oxygen. His lips and cheeks are blue and his eyes are bloodshot.

Now I'm in the 2nd holding cell. The receptionist walked us to the room and as she's closing the door she tell us, "The doctor will be right in." Yeah right.

Why don't they say, "I hope you brought your pillow because you might as well get comfortable- you'll be waiting awhile."

I think they tell you that because it saves them on cotton balls, gauze and alcohol preps. People don't get around to searching the cabinets and stealing such items until they realize they've been waiting forever for a doctor who will show up when they're good and ready to do so.

It also saves the doctor time in the long run because all the questions you were going to ask the doctor are long forgotten so all the doctor has to do is check your ears and hand you one of his pre-written prescriptions. If anyone dares to question the good doctor on what the medication is for, the doctor just has to make mention of the extra pounds that you still need to lose and the appointment is over. The patient clams up and the doc heads for the door.

Why does every doctor's office have a set of Busy Beads? How did this get to be the standard office toy? After graduating from med school is each doctor presented with a white coat and their very own Busy Bead set? And, how is it that kids all across the United States fight over this wooden and wire primary colored toy? Kids would never play at their own house with a toy without lights or buttons to push. My kids would have cut the wires off that sort of thing a long time ago and tried to make a video game cord out of it.