Thursday, January 08, 2009

FYI

“She was acting so retarded!”

“Oh my gosh, that’s so retarded!”

“I can’t believe I did that! I’m so retarded.”

FYI…my son is retarded. I mean actually retarded.

The definition of retarded is: delay or hold back in terms of progress, development or accomplishment. Also, a mentally handicapped person.

Yep, my son is retarded.

Do you remember when you were pregnant and previously you didn’t know or see anyone pregnant but then all the sudden everywhere you looked you saw pregnant people? Well, before I had a son that was retarded I never thought much of the word. I was actually a sayer of the retarded word.

Do not take this as condemnation. Take it as education.

Oh my gosh! People say things and people are retarded ALL THE TIME around me and I just want to yell and say, “Um, my son is retarded! Did you mean that you’re acting retarded like my son is acting retarded?”

If I hear something like that on tv or a movie I don’t really get offended. I know it’s a part of our language. I’m not an idiot. I know what they mean. I understand that they don’t have a particular retarded person in mind when they’re saying it. I know they just mean silly, stupid or ignorant. I know the word is just being used for another word. My point is that the “other” word should be used instead of using retarded. However, it does baffle me when people are talking to me and know my personal situation and still use the word retarded in a negative way.

Only one time have I called a person on using the “R” word. I will protect my dear friend by not mentioning her name on here. I only told her because I actually love her so much and I trusted that she would understand where I was coming from. She used to say it all the time. And I mean all the time. I tried to get over it on my own, but it would make me crazy every time she would say it so I maturely confronted her about it, and she’s only slipped one time after that and immediately she caught herself and apologized. I’m actually very thankful and impressed with her thoughtfulness to change her vocabulary so quickly, at least around me anyway.

Something that I need to stop saying is, “That’s so gay.” Now I know this could be a little controversial since this sort of implies that I’m saying that like people that are retarded can’t help being retarded neither can gay people help being gay. I’m not saying that and I’m not, not saying that. What I am saying is that using the statement “That’s so gay” is rude and unnecessary. If Randy has on a shirt that makes his tall, thin body look feminine then I can just tell him that the shirt doesn’t look good on him because it looks too feminine. That way I’m not putting anyone else down to tell Randy that I don’t like a particular shirt.

Do I want you to be edgy with what you say around me?
No.
Am I being too easily offended at what others say?
No.
Do I want you to stop saying the word retarded?
It would be nice, but it’s not a requirement for our relationship.
Do I want you to stop and think about what I’m saying?
Yes.
Do I want you to change your mind and stop being retarded... I mean offensive?
Yes, that would be nice.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

NEVER THOUGHT OF IT THAT WAY. YOU SURE DO MAKE ME USE MY BRAIN...
AND HE WILL ONLY BE GONE TILL FEB. 13TH. SO NOT TO BAD THIS TIME. AND HE WILL BE IN CALI.
SO HE WILL STILL BE IN THE USA.
WOO HOO.....
MAYBE HE COULD STOP IN ON BC & BECKY

Agent B said...

No. Believe me.

Randy's shirts look gay.

trish said...

Thanks Brandi!

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for your honesty.