At church yesterday we were told to stand and look into our spouse’s eyes for 15 seconds and then tell them what it is that we cherish about them.
Randy went first and surprisingly, his response was that it really does it for him when I look at him with confidence. He loves it. He likes it when I feel good about myself, and when I know I can handle things. That comment made me feel so good.
The thing about Randy that I cherish was so hard for me to say because I thought that if I started to explain then I would not stop crying. I didn’t really know what I was going to say at first, but when I was looking into his eyes and thinking about Randy I knew what it was. It’s how he takes care of Miles. When I see Randy taking care of Miles it makes me feel so secure. He takes care of Miles needs so seemingly effortlessly, and without me asking him to do things that it just makes me know that I’m not alone. It affirms in me that we really can do anything together. Nothing is going to happen in our marriage that will be too hard to work out. When he takes care of Miles I know that we’re in this together until death do us part.
This weekend we went to two wonderful weddings. They were so beautiful and the couples were so in love. Several times while I was at the weddings I looked around at all the details of the wedding, the dresses, and all the attention that the brides were getting. I saw the couples and the romance in their eyes. It was such a treat to see.
Our wedding was a cheap little wedding. When Randy and I got married no one really believed in us so we were on our own with the wedding. We paid for almost everything ourselves. It was nothing like the weddings we went to this weekend. While I was at the weddings I thought a few times about how fun everything must have been to plan the wedding. I thought several times about the honeymoons that would follow. Randy and I already lived together when we got married so there were no surprises if you know what I mean.
Anyway, with all the beauty of the weddings, with all the romance oozing from every pore of the bride and groom, with all the excitement in the room I decided I wouldn’t go back to the beginning with Randy for any of it. I didn’t leave those weddings depressed that every day isn’t dreamy bliss. I’ll tell you that the peace that we have with each other is dreamy bliss!
The relationship that Randy and I have is too wonderful to write about. We really are best friends. We talk on the phone several times a day, we laugh at each other’s jokes, and we sincerely care about what each other is going through. And there’s no way that I would choose “first time sex” over “totally free now sex”. There’s no comparison! So, all that to say, I love my marriage. I thoroughly believe that besides having a personal relationship with Christ on earth there’s nothing better than a good marriage. Kids will come and go, but a marriage is what sticks. I’m thankful for that.